Adventures in Homeschooling

NEGATIVES?

2012-01-06T15:09:00.004-06:00

A comment I recently read on Twitter about scheduled eating got me thinking about a few things that are realities in my kids' lives, but not of their traditionally-schooled peers. We don't live by the clock. Sure, we sometimes have to be somewhere at a certain time (doctor's appointments, club meetings, dance, and gymnastics, etc.), but for the most part, we live at our own pace. By "we", I mean the kids and I because Husband has a full time job and has to be there on time. Anyway, we generally go to bed around the same time at night and wake up at the same time each morning (except for Baby and I because he is still fairly nocturnal). The kids never like to eat breakfast immediately after waking, so there is usually a relaxed, waking up period before anyone asks for food. We eat lunch depending on what else we have to accomplish that day. Dinner is late, by American standards. We snack when we're hungry in between meals.

Some people would fault me and say that my kids will freak out when they hit the "real world" and discover that there is a Schedule to things like eating and sleeping. I have to disagree. There is only a Schedule, if you want there to be one. For example, my kids plan on going to college. College is run according to class times, and therefore, a Schedule. Except that you have some flexibility in when you schedule your classes. More importantly, if you choose to attend a college, then you have chosen to live according to that Schedule. That's what it's all about to me-Choice. I chose a career in education. That meant that on work days, I had to use the restroom and eat according to the school's Schedule. Sometimes it sucked, but I always recognized that I had decided to be a teacher. Husband works in a more traditional, office setting. When he has to go to the bathroom, he goes. When he's hungry, he snacks at his desk, and so on. Adults have way more flexibility in their daily lives than any schooled kid.

Some parents stress about raising their kids to have financial success. We definitely want our sons and daughters to be able to live independently, but our biggest goal is that they grow up knowing that they have choices and that your choice always comes with responsibility. That's why we don't skip dance or gymnastics classes on a whim. Mom drives around like a madwoman to fit things in on days when she has to be at her part time job. Dad plans vacation days carefully, so as to not interfere with his professional life. I don't equate learning to eat on command as a requirement for a happy life.

NIGHT SCHOOL

2011-11-29T00:41:00.001-06:00

It finally happened. I decided that completing even a minimum amount of "school work" with a twelve month old is too much to deal with. It stresses me out, which leads to me stressing the kids out, which leads to a miserable learning environment. Even when we waited until he was napping, I felt rushed and everyone had to tiptoe around. The fun was gone. The easiest fix seems to be doing our school stuff in the evenings, after Dad gets home to take over with Baby. It means we have to work around various dance and gymnastics classes, but it's doable.

FINALLY FOUND THE BALANCE

2011-11-02T21:40:00.001-05:00

I have written before about my frustration with the Whole Language Method of teaching a child to read, which is only equal to my frustration with an entirely phonics-based reading program. For my third attempt, I think I have finally reached a balanced approach. To do it, I had to let go of some of my previous opinions of the way Kindergartens are run in traditional schools. I also had to drown out the noise from the unpleasant unschoolers in my local area. Definitely not representative of the general population of unschoolers I’ve come in contact with, but wow, do they give the group a bad reputation.

My five year old has been asking me to teach her to read since last spring. She has already learned to sight read and write several words, much more than the other two ever did on their own before Kindergarten. I attribute it to her being around her literate siblings and wanting to be able to do what they can. Anyway, I have started finding K lessons online and either using them as is, or modifying them to suit her personality and learning style. It’s all been low-key, and she seems to be enjoying herself. Originally, she had planned on knowing how to read at the end of Day One, but I think she’s gotten into a happy pattern of learning at a realistic pace. What I once viewed as a giant waste of time (and paper), I now see for the useful methods they are. When kids spend enough time both sight reading and learning letter sounds, they learn to read. It doesn’t have to be boring, and it certainly doesn’t have to be forced on them.

JUST CALL ME A MOUSE

2011-10-11T22:27:00.001-05:00

A new blog post on Psychology Today’s site makes some interesting points about the chances of real reform coming to America’s education system (they are slim to none), with a focus on how things won’t change until more people wash their hands of the system altogether.

I found myself agreeing with the author, Peter Gray. Like Sir Ken Robinson, I believe that we need an educational revolution, not reform. Many of my homeschooling peers bash schools and the system, give thanks that their kids aren’t in it, and wash their hands of the mess.

I can’t do that, one because I am, by profession, a teacher. I went into teaching because I love kids and want to help them learn and become happy adults. Whether my kids have to suffer through traditional schooling or not, millions of other kids do. Many of those kids do not have strong advocates, in the form of parents or guardians. Their parents either accept the status quo of the educational system, feel powerless or disenfranchised from the powers in charge, or don’t care. If we, as educators, don’t stand up for these kids, their rights, and their futures, then who will?

Secondly, even if I didn’t care about the other children in this country, I care about mine. The people they have to live with and around and be governed by are mainly people who will have attended traditional schools. Do I want my kids to live in a world full of ignorant, small-minded, homogenous peers or creative, thoughtful, unique individuals? I can’t homeschool everyone’s kids, and not everyone should or could teach their own, so my goal has to be a better system for all.

12 HOUR DAYS?

2011-09-28T10:06:00.001-05:00

We no longer pay for television service, so all of our viewing is over the internet, via our Roku box, on our TV. I say this because it means that, except for the few shows we watch on Hulu, we don’t have commercials. The kids haven’t seen one at home in months. Last week, we were at my parents’ house, and I heard a lead-in for the local evening news. Over footage of African-American kids, the newscaster asked, “Are twelve hour days the cure for our schools?”

Let’s examine that a little further. Twelve hour school days? Kids need about eight or nine hours of sleep, right? So, that means they are with their families for about four hours a day? That is the cure?

What districts are really saying when the extend school hours is that you are not the best person to raise your child. Take your kid out of your environment, and they might become productive members of society. The worst part is that, in some situations, they are correct. Kids living at the poverty level, with uneducated parents, who are possibly criminals and probably drug users, WILL have a better chance at success if they spend more time with caring adults. Forget academics, if a kid feels safe and loved, they will have a more fulfilling life. My issue is that, rather than focus on societal changes, we take peoples kids away, and we aren’t honest about it. Because no district can say, we are better for your kids than you are, they then carry the longer school day idea into populations that won’t benefit from it. If you see jumps in standardized test scores in a low-performing school, it is likely for the reasons I’ve mentioned (safety, caring, etc.). That does not mean that all schools need that, or that you will see the same gains. (This is ignoring the fact that test scores are horrible indicators of someone’s potential, but I’ll leave that alone right now.)

I know I’m radical, but if we educated teenagers more about what it means to be a parent, if we made birth control more accessible, if we put programs in place so that kids from poor homes could break the cycle, then we wouldn’t need to take kids away from their families. There will always be bad parents and kids who deserve more, but maybe we can lower those numbers. Who knows, maybe these kids who spend twelve hours a day at school will do that, but I doubt it. Our traditional school system is broken, and I’m not confident that making kids experience more of it is the solution.

THE DIFFERENCE

2011-09-16T01:23:00.001-05:00

I think I’ve mentioned before that one of the ways I encourage creative writing is through the use of “Sticker Stories”. The kids create a picture (or several) using stickers they like and drawings, then write a short story to go with it. I started it when Kathleen was in Kindergarten, and the SS’s have been a hit ever since. They especially like buying special packs of holiday stickers (Halloween is a favorite) to write about.

This afternoon, Kathleen said she was going to write an SS. She spent a couple of hours on the story and illustrations, which spanned several pages. Afterwards, she told me that she’d flipped back through her notebook, to read the SS’s she’d written over the years. She pointed out that she could immediately spot the difference between the ones she had written for fun, and the ones I had asked her to write…the “assigned” ones were much shorter.

You might think that her awareness of that difference would influence me to lay off asking the kids to write. Not quite. Just as Kathleen saw a difference in her enthusiasm, I see a difference in the learning styles of my kids. Kathleen has been writing short stories, for fun, since she was in Kindergarten. The SS’s were just a way to inspire her, and she’s never written one under protest. What she saw was the difference between being inspired and trying to force creativity. I can see that Alexander is still not in a place where he would write for fun. He may never be there, and that’s totally fine. He does need to be able to write coherently, which is why I will continued to suggest SS’s to him. Grace will soon be writing her own, but for now, she still enjoys dictating them. Only time will tell if she is a natural writer, who enjoys the process, or not.

CARTOON MENACE?

2011-09-13T12:01:00.001-05:00

Spongebob is in the news again, and this time, it isn’t because the GOP thinks he’s gay. Personally, I neither love nor loathe the yellow guy. The kids watch sometimes, and the only issue I have brought up with them is that Squidward is not the bad guy (Spongebob and Patrick drive him nuts). Reading the article got me thinking about cartoons that my kids watch. Our whole family has a great love for Avatar: The Last Airbender. If you and your kids haven’t seen it, you are missing out.

The show is set in an alternate world and revolves around the universal themes of good vs evil, the powers of love and friendship, horrible parents vs great ones, etc. The illustrations are a blend of American and Anime styles and lovely to watch. The story unfolds over the couple of seasons and ends in several epic showdowns that leave me teary eyed every time I see them. We have had wonderful conversations as a family about the stories and the lessons we can learn from them.

The kids and their friends have had hours of fun pretending to be Benders (in the story, there are certain people who can manipulate the four elements-earth, air, fire, and water). They went online and found some “Bending Scrolls” that teach the various forms, which are all based on martial arts. After printing the scrolls out, they aged them, whittled sticks to attach to the ends, and played.

Avatar has had the same success capturing my kids’ imagination as Star Wars and Doctor Who, which is to say that it has become an integral part of their childhood. We watched the live-action movie version a few months ago and were horribly disappointed. Do not watch it, and if you saw it without having seen the cartoon, wipe it from your mind. We are always on the lookout for great stuff we can all enjoy together as a family, and this show fits the bill 100%. All of the seasons are available for instant viewing on Netflix…

TESTING 1, 2, 3…

2011-09-13T01:08:00.001-05:00

I’m brand new to Windows 7, so I am trying out the Windows Live Writer :) So far, I like…Will try a real blog entry tomorrow.

WEEK TWO

2011-09-12T15:32:00.001-05:00

The day was off to a poor start when the baby decided not to go to sleep until 3am. I really should have just extended the weekend, but I am a fool sometimes. All three of the kids worked on their math, online, at the same time, which was amazing. I let Grace use the new computer because I thought the touch screen would work well with her little hands, although she still chose to use the mouse half the time.

In more creative news, the kids all plan on entering the same wildlife-themed art contest they did last year. It's with US Wildlife and Fisheries at a local preserve. Alexander won Honorable Mention last year. Grace is finally old enough to participate, so she's excited. They have to create an original drawing or painting, depicting native plants and/or animals. She asked me if lions live around here :)

LIFE LESSONS

2011-09-07T23:36:00.000-05:00

About two months after we brought Henry, our adopted son, home, a friend asked, "So, they treat him just like he really is their brother?" about my other kids. It was such an odd question to be because Yes, of course they do! He IS their real brother. My entire adult life, I have believed that your parents aren't your parents because of biology; they are the people who raise you. We began talking about adoption, as a normal way for a child to join a family, when Kathleen was tiny. The conversation continued until we actually signed up with an agency to adopt. At that point, it wasn't just talk any more. We actively discussed how the process works, and what it would be like when we actually brought a baby home. Honestly, adoption has opened up all sorts of wonderful talks about many issues: race, class, poverty, healthy choices, safe sex, what it means to be a parent, and dozens more I can't even remember right now. Our kids have gotten age-appropriate glimpses into the lives of people different from their parents. They have been exposed to poverty, from a distance, but closer than most kids their ages/races/socio-economic levels. They know that just because a woman cannot care for her own children, it doesn't mean that she's a monster or crazy or wrong.

Today, we had another visit with Henry's birthmother. The kids find it all totally normal. We all sit around and talk, and the kids show off their little brother to the young woman who gave birth to him. She gets a sense of how loved he is, and we feel good that she gets to experience some of his life.

We certainly did not set out to adopt as a means to teach our kids about life, but the journey has turned out to be more educational (for all of us) than we could have ever imagined. And for those parents out there who secretly wonder-Yes, the love we feel for Henry is the same as for our biological children. I look at his sweet face, and feel that he's mine, and I am his :)

AND, WE'RE OFF

2011-09-06T11:51:00.002-05:00

Grace is wildly excited about her first day of Kindergarten. She has been keen to learn to read for six months now and started sight-reading on her own a while ago. When I added her to our IXL account, you would have thought it was Christmas!

Today's business will be working on their scrapbook/journals of our mega-trip to New York and New England. I had been shopping around before the trip for reasonably priced scrapbooks for the kids and had no luck. $10 might sound cheap, until you multiply it by three. I found them, on the trip, at IKEA of all places! They had nicely bound scrapbooks, in three different colors, for $3.99 (with the IKEA Family discount card). Husband wasn't so thrilled about buying books to lug home, but the price was too good to pass up. We bought stickers before we left and took over five hundred pictures, so we have a lot to work with.

Since she wants to do "real" schoolwork, Grace will probably work on IXL and Starfall too. I'll have the other kids do a math lesson online too. Have I mentioned that they do their scratchwork on a mini-dry erase board? It reminds me of Little House on the Prairie, where all of the kids had a slate. If we still had neighborhood, one-room schoolhouses, I probably would have taught there and enrolled my kids. Maybe school reform would do well to look to the past for some ideas on what would best serve kids in the future?

NOT BACK TO SCHOOL SHOPPING: +1 STUDENT, BUT CHEAPER THAN EVER

2011-09-03T22:53:00.000-05:00

We are finally home from our epic, twenty day vacation. It was supposed to be a bit shorter, but Hurricane Irene had other plans. I could go on and on about how great the trip was, but I will try to sum it up in a few sentences. Riding the train for nearly thirty hours together was AMAZING. I cannot recommend train travel in the US enough! I had only ridden trains in Europe before and was repeatedly warned away from Amtrak. Those naysayers were WRONG. We are now huge fans and will continue to travel that way in the future. Sadly, the hurricane ruined our plans for a return train ride home, and we ended up flying back. New York City blew the kids away, and we all (except for Husband) want to live there. New Hampshire was pretty, and we had a great time visiting with family. It was terrifyingly white, with no visible diversity, at least where we were. Maine was lovely, and the kids had fun visiting their grandparents. As beautiful as New England was, I found that it didn't hold a candle to the extreme gorgeousness of the West. That trip to Yellowstone has left us with the pull to move out there.

So, now we are back home and beginning another non-traditional school year. The public schools started on August 8th here, which is insanely early. Our official start date is the 12th, only because that's when we left on our highly educational vacation. Otherwise, I would have waited until after Labor Day, like civilized people! Today, while Tropical Storm Lee drenched the yard, I made my annual Amazon order for the year. Even though Grace is now officially a student, our costs went down!

Websites:
Since January, I've been paying IXL for access to their math program, which I still really love. I added Grace as a student, which only cost an additional $1.73/month. I now pay slightly less than $14/month for math. For the first time, I upped my Spelling City membership to premium, which allows you to list up to five students. That cost $24.99/year. I was fine using the free membership last year, but now that they've added Vocabulary City, I wanted to access the entire site.

Books:
I ordered each of the older kids a workbook in Geography and Science, both by Spectrum. I was happy with Kathleen's from last year. I am not at all a workbook driven kind of teacher, but the topics were interesting, and since there is always a chance that the kids will want to attend a traditional school for high school, I figure that it can't hurt to have them be a little familiar with the type of school work assigned in traditional schools. Grace is getting a Kumon book of writing first words because I used it with Alexander and liked it. I also got a National Geographic book of historical mysteries that seemed intriguing. It struck me as the perfect jumping off point to interest the kids in world history. My Amazon total was $53.

Our first order of "school" business next week will be creating scrapbooks/journals of our fabulous vacation!

RADIO SILENCE

2011-08-09T01:37:00.000-05:00

I haven't been on in a while, but I swear I have the best excuse. I last blogged in the second week of April. On the 19th, we got THE CALL about a baby who needed us. After two years and ten months of waiting, we finally adopted! A new baby, who came home with no real notice, has thrown us all into ultra-busy mode. Writing had to take a backseat to settling in to our new lives as a family of six. It's now August, and things have taken on a pattern resembling a normal life. We are about to embark on an enormous adventure/vacation, which includes an overnight train ride. I hope to write about the experience while we're living it, then get back to education/homeschool stuff once we get back.

Today was the first day of school for the Awayschooled population, so I faced my usual sense of anxiety/rebellion at not sending my kids. I occasionally get overwhelmed by the realization that we have managed to raise our oldest to the age of eleven, without her ever setting foot in a traditional classroom. It is both breathtaking and heart stopping. We still think we are following the right path for our family, but when I examine how unorthodox we have been (especially because I am a rule-follower by nature), I am shocked. How could we? How come more people don't?

WHAT DOES HOMESCHOOLING LOOK LIKE: A DAY IN THE LIFE

2011-04-05T20:34:00.000-05:00

When I was researching homeschooling years ago, I was always curious about what it actually looked like in real life. All of the info I found about it was helpful, but I was always searching for people's experiences. It occurs to me that I've now been a homeschooler for six years, and a glimpse into our daily life might be helpful to any newbies out there.

We all woke up at about the same time (except for Dad, who always has to wake up much earlier to go to work).
Kathleen and Alexander took the dogs out (after being reminded for the millionth time).
All three ate breakfast while watching cartoons.
Kathleen continued writing the story she started yesterday on the computer. Keep in mind that this was entirely her own idea and not an assignment. Writing/Grammar/Spelling
Alexander decided to jump on the trampoline. P.E.
Kathleen wrapped up the chapter she was writing, and she and Grace joined him. P.E.
After about 40 minutes, they all came in to play with their Playmobil sets together. I adore the fact that the three of them can play an imagination-based game together.
Lunch
More trampoline time. P.E.
Alexander and Kathleen each logged onto IXL (which, if I haven't mentioned before, is GREAT) to work on some math practices. Math/Computer/Reading(A's lesson was reading intensive)
Both kids took spelling tests at Spelling City. Spelling/Computer
All three kids picked up their toys from the living room.
Even more trampoline time (it was a spectacularly beautiful day) P.E.
Dinner, which included an impromptu, round table spelling game, just for fun.

There you go. Some days include a lot more "school" and less time outside. Others have us running all over town to get to various activities. I'll keep blogging our days this week, just to give a more accurate idea of what we actually get up to! Today was a rare day, when we didn't have to be anywhere. Tomorrow, in addition to some formal school work, we have the allergist, gymnastics, and dance...

INSANE

2011-03-30T12:18:00.000-05:00

Someone in our homeschool group just sent around an email from Ron Paul, under the pretense that he's going to give homeschoolers tax credits, if he becomes president. In the email, he promises to abolish the Dept. of Education. I am so angry that it was sent and even more incensed by his ridiculous statements, that I can't really form a coherent counter-argument right now. Maybe I'll write more after my blood pressure goes back down.

PAY TEACHERS MORE. MONEY OR RESPECT?

2011-03-16T21:13:00.000-05:00

I read this editorial piece in the New York Times by Nicholas Kristof, concerning the recent trend in Conservative politics to attack teachers and lay the blame for various state's financial woes on them. While it was refreshing to hear a balanced approach to the issue, after weeks of comments about lazy teachers having easy jobs, I have to disagree with some of what Kristof believes. More than that, I have to again state that teaching is a profession. A few of Kristof's statements lead me to believe that he, like most Americans, don't know the first thing about child development, the human brain, and how learning occurs.

Kristof begins by arguing that teachers are not earning huge salaries and deserve to be compensated much more than they are. He then brings up the issue of gender discrimination in the past; a time when one of the only career paths open to women was Education.

"Brilliant women became elementary school teachers, because better jobs weren’t open to them."

"These days, brilliant women become surgeons and investment bankers — and 47 percent of America’s kindergarten through 12th-grade teachers come from the bottom one-third of their college classes (as measured by SAT scores)."

I have several issues with these statements. At face value, I would agree with the first one. Obviously, if teaching was the only job available to women, both the brilliant and non-brilliant worked in that field. The fact that Kristof defines brilliance based on SAT scores troubles me. Once again, the debate about US education has dissolved into the swamp of standardized test scores. This 47 percent of teachers were in the bottom one-third of their college classes? Since SAT scores are taken by high school juniors and seniors, it seems like Kristof (and the authors of the original study) doesn't believe that these students learned anything in college. Just because someone didn't score well on a standardized test, doesn't mean they aren't potentially brilliant or capable of learning more in their adulthood than they did in adolescence. Nit-picky, I know, but I really cannot stand standardized tests as the basis for judging people or groups of people's intelligence.

Ignoring my argument about using SAT scores to determine brilliance, let's look at the figure again. If 47 percent come from the bottom, then 53 percent comes from someplace closer to the top. There are plenty of brilliant women who choose to become teachers, rather than surgeons or lawyers. Based on scores alone, my standardized tests indicate that I place in the top one-third. I did not pursue education as a career because it was all I could do. Unlike other women I know, I didn't choose it because I would be off with my kids on holidays. Call me sensitive, but I think that too little attention is paid to women (and men) who choose to become teachers because they are passionate about children and the learning process. We already exist, yet politicians continue to talk only of recruiting higher quality people to the profession. If our society doesn't treat the professionals it already has as such, why in the world would anyone but the most idealistic or the least qualified want to join up?

"Recent scholarship suggests that good teachers, even kindergarten teachers, increase their students’ earnings many years later."

What exactly does Kristof mean by "even kindergarten teachers"? In child development terms, the road kids follow is laid in the very first years of their lives. Kindergarten being the first time many kids from uneducated and/or poor families are exposed to a nurturing learning environment, how can we cling to the notion that it isn't important? What happens to our five and six year olds sets them on either a path to exploration and learning or one filled with boredom and failure. Kindergarten teachers may just be the most important link in the chain.

"Moreover, part of compensation is public esteem. When governors mock teachers as lazy, avaricious incompetents, they demean the profession and make it harder to attract the best and brightest. We should be elevating teachers, not throwing darts at them."

I have no complaints about this comment. As a public school teacher, I was treated with suspicion by parents who had struggled in their own school years and scorn by the parents who felt superior to me because they had chosen to become doctors or lawyers. The occasional parent who looked on me as a professional, with valid opinions about their child's education, stand out in my memory because they were so few and far between.

"Research suggests that students would benefit from a tradeoff of better teachers but worse teacher-student ratios. Thus there are growing calls for a Japanese model of larger classes, but with outstanding, respected, well-paid teachers."

Really? So "better" teachers could inspire and educate larger groups of kids? How exactly does this research define "better"? Anyone who has not actually taught classrooms full of kids shouldn't get a vote here. I had thirty kids in my classes. Being a high standardized test scorer somehow made me more able to silence noisy kids, still wiggly kids, etc? Throwing in the comment about Japanese models is laughable. First of all, Japan is rapidly moving away from their current model of high-pressure education because they realized that it didn't produce valuable results and led to too much stress on the students. Secondly, has Kristof ever visited an American classroom and a Japanese one? My mother-in-law visited a few Japanese schools, as part of a teacher exchange program, four years ago. The grade school students worked on a rotating schedule to deliver lunch. They spent the last ten minutes of every school day scrubbing their desks and cleaning the floor. I happen to think that level of responsibility is great. Mainstream American parents would have strokes if someone made little Johnny clean anything. American students are not like Japanese students; they aren't taught the levels of respect, discipline, and responsibility here. You cannot compare a large class of Japanese children to a class of our kids, unless we change our entire society first.

I began to read Kristof's piece with optimism that someone would cut through the layers of misinformation swirling around the teaching profession. While I am glad that he defended the need for higher pay, and I agree with some of his criticism of teachers unions, I was underwhelmed by his knowledge of how children learn, and the true importance of teachers.

LOVE WHAT I DO

2011-02-23T15:06:00.000-06:00

We're about to photograph toy fairies in the yard so that Kathleen (and maybe Grace) can write stories to go along with the pictures. Alexander is rounding up some Lego people to do the same. Fun, fun, fun!!!

I had a great conversation with another homeschooling mom today. She asked if I'd ever read Little Men by Louisa May Alcott. That happens to be the very book which inspired me to become a teacher. I have always wanted to be Jo and run a school for troubled boys (or girls, or both). Since college, I have warned my husband that if we ever win the lottery, we are opening just such a school. We would spend our days educating kids who no one else thought was worth the effort. It was so cool to meet someone who felt the same way. She said she had just discovered that Alcott based the book on her own father's ideas about education!

EXPLANABRAG

2011-02-18T10:40:00.000-06:00

First off, thanks to last night's episode of Community, I have a new word. I am using it to discuss one of those moments in homeschooling that appear in books and seem a bit far fetched. You know the ones I mean, where a homeschooled kid makes some connection or chooses an activity that makes you wonder if their parents have put them up to it. I must have mentioned the time I told Alexander that he had to read something (anything!!!) for a while before playing a video game. He picked a book of science experiments he had checked out from the library, enlisted the help of his sister, and built a weather vane. Even I had trouble believing that was going on.

Yesterday, it was Kathleen's turn. I recently realized that she has never had to write anything in the standard essay format (five paragraphs...). She has been writing fiction since she was five, but I wanted to make sure she could communicate facts in a coherent way. A few days ago, I had her choose a topic she wanted to research and write about. We looked some stuff up online at various sites, printed out the info, and she read it. The next day, I told her about the five paragraphs and the purpose of each, while we were doing our hair; I love that by homeschooling, we aren't tethered to a desk to "learn". After that, I started her on finding the topics she wanted to discuss and taking notes from the printouts. She came to me yesterday to say that she was going to invent an animal, make up information about it's habitat, diet, etc., then write an essay on it. Some parents might not get how cool that is, but as a former public school teacher, I can tell you that kids don't do that sort of thing often. They might, if they had the educational freedom that many homeschoolers do, but as the current system stands, they don't. A kid wanting to write MORE than what was asked of them? A kid grasping the entire purpose of writing a factual essay (communicate info to an audience), before she'd finished writing her first one? A kid tapping into her own imagination and creativity to invent her own animal (including "scientific" name) based on the guidelines of the factual information she had read?

All in all, a great day of homeschooling.

HOW NOT TO BROADEN YOUR HORIZONS

2011-02-15T13:11:00.000-06:00

It probably seems like I spend an inordinate amount of time reporting on the activities of the local homeschool groups I belong to. I truly can't help myself. If I discuss it with my non-homeschooling friends and family, they only hear "crazy homeschoolers". Obviously, I can't talk about the members to the members, so this is my only outlet (besides my husband, who can only take so much).

I mentioned before that we joined the local Unschooling group because the families seemed much more like-minded to our philosophies and way of life. Since then, a new family who joined the "secular" group I have belonged to for years called me an unschooler. I was caught off guard and told him that a Radical Unschooler would disagree with him on that. Have I mentioned how much labels drive me nuts? Anyway, that group is in the midst of a freak out, mainly (or maybe entirely) between two women.

One mom dared to use the word grounded in connection with discipline, and it was ON. It could have been an opportunity for a healthy discussion about parenting styles, teenagers, adolescent behavior, discipline (which means to teach, not to punish), etc. Instead, one mother of an only child took it upon herself to claim that discipline has no place in the life of unschooling families. She took the step of contacting other Radical Unschoolers not in the group about this other member's comments. She then posted all of their answers. The original poster is offended that her info was shared with people outside of the group, and it has degenerated into a fight.

I never really paid attention to the original comments about the grounding of the teenager, so I have no real thoughts on her behavior or her parents reaction. I do know that she (the teen) credits her parents' involvement with setting her on a better path. My issue here is that narrowly following a set of rules never leads to a broader view of the world. If someone is confronted with a different way of doing something, and they only consult others who already share their beliefs, then how will they ever get a fresh perspective? I am not saying that everyone is right or that some ways of raising children aren't better than some other methods. (Read The Moral Landscape by Sam Harris if you suffer from the rational, thinking person's guilt at judging other cultures or belief systems. His discussions about true morality, based on what is best for all of humanity will help, I promise.) All I'm suggesting is that if you don't at least peek at what the rest of the world does, you cannot reasonably defend your own position. You cannot say Radical Unschooling is best, if you have never honestly compared the outcomes with those of other methods of schooling/parenting.

A BLOG POST WRITTEN BY A MAN IN THE PAST

2011-01-30T00:44:00.000-06:00

That's one conclusion I've drawn from reading this blog post. The author lists reasons that homeschooling families should never do their schoolwork in their pj's. In response, I will write a rebuttal (not that he will ever read or understand it):

Clothes Send a Message: Yes, they do. TO PEOPLE YOU MEET IN PUBLIC. No one sees my kids in their pj's because we are HOMESCHOOLERS. When we hit the town for a park day, field trip, or errand, we all wear street clothes. From what I hear from my college professor sister-in-law, that's more than her students do. She constantly has girls in pj pants and tanks or t-shirts showing up in class. Making my kids put on clothes would not make them think school work is more important than if I let them stay in their pj's. Mom wearing jeans, rather than flannel pants will not make fractions or history or science more or less interesting. If it does, then there is a problem.
The Parents Are Setting an Example: Yes, we are. The example is that learning is fun and a stepping stone to their future. My pj's do not make my kids forget that I earned a Bachelors and a Masters degree, worked professionally, bought a house, got (and stayed) married, had children, chose to stay home to raise them, etc. I live the example I want them to see every day (and so does their loving father). I love where I am in life. Not getting dolled up before we watch a Bill Nye video isn't going to erase that from their minds.
It's a Bad Habit: The author claims that wearing pj's to homeschool might leave the kids unable to get jobs as adults because they won't know that people where clothes in the professional world. This assumes that children are morons.
It's Bad for the Reputation of the Homeschool Community: Again, he realizes that he's talking about what kids wear IN THEIR HOUSES, right? My kids don't go outside to play in their jammies. How will the public get a negative view of the way we dress (and who cares anyway???) unless they are spying on us.

Mr. Homeschool Fashion Police goes on to say that he doesn't mean Mom has to wear nylons. Nylons? The last time I heard someone call them that was my best friend's mom, when I was ten. That's how I figured out that he's writing from the past. He obviously has never visited 2011, when college girls wear pj's to class and thousands of actual adults telecommute to their professional jobs IN THEIR PAJAMAS.

AM I MIDDLE OF THE ROAD?

2011-01-18T23:37:00.000-06:00

Now that I have been spending more time (online mostly, but also a bit in real life) with official unschoolers, I am more confused than ever about where I am on the homeschooling spectrum. I found a forum on Secular Homeschool.com dedicated to styles of homeschooling and started a thread about the purpose of labeling ourselves. The parents on there had a civil discussion about what the meaning of labels is to them, which was refreshing. A polite tussle occurred on the Unschooling email group because someone dared to refer to themselves as an unschooler, while still teaching certain subjects to her child. That is apparently a huge mistake. If you teach anything directly, you cannot be considered an unschooler (and definitely not a radical unschooler, whatever the difference is). Those who follow a curriculum are straight up homeschoolers. Anyone who picks and chooses their materials and lessons, often based on the interests of the children, is an eclectic homeschooler. Bored yet?

I just don't have the passion for labels that so many seem to. I'm not going to walk around introducing myself by the type of homeschooling I practice (eclectic I guess, if I must be boxed in), so what does it matter? Someone in the discussion said that labels make it easier to find people you have things in common with. As I have complained about many times on this blog, our SECULAR homeschool group struggles to understand the meaning of the word. So much for using the label to find people like me!

On the far opposite of the education spectrum from radical unschoolers is someone like my mother-in-law, a former teacher. I have mentioned before that she became a teacher for the schedule and has debated with me over whether a teacher is a professional (I say yes). The other day, I mentioned something about a new public, online charter school coming to our state next year. She came back with a comment about how I follow the public school curriculum anyway. The look on her face when I said that I didn't can only be classified as polite shock. Guess I'm more radical than I thought...

WHAT I'M READING

2011-01-04T14:19:00.000-06:00

If I haven't mentioned him before, Sir Ken Robinson, Ph.D. is amazing. His ideas about education and the human potential are brilliant and inspirational (not in the religious sense). I got his book The Element: How Finding Your Passion Changes Everything for Christmas. I haven't even reached the chapter on education yet, and I'm hooked. His celebration of all talent and how it interacts within a person and with the rest of the world is powerful. I highly recommend this to everyone, whether you have homeschool or not and for people with no kids at all. It might just change the way you view yourself and your own life!

5 YEAR OLDS WHO WANT TO BE "HOT"?????????

2010-11-23T11:42:00.000-06:00

I just read a super depressing article about how Disney is moving on from making Princess movies because, "By the time they're 5 or 6, [girls are] not interested in being princesses. They're interested in being hot, in being cool. Clearly, they see this is what society values." I'm not upset because little girls might not idolize princesses. The loss is that little girls don't want to be LITTLE GIRLS anymore.

My first real experience with homeschooling in its modern form was way back when Kathleen was about a year old. I had taken K and her cousin to play at the local park and noticed two moms and a group of about six, school-aged kids. While the mothers chatted, the kids were playing a spastic game of tag. What caught my attention was the oldest girl, who looked to be about thirteen years old. I had just spent a year teaching kids her age in public school and in that time, not one girl her age had voluntarily run around like a little kid. Recess time for the sixth graders was girls standing in groups talking about each other and boys, while the boys either did the same, or played soccer or football. I was captivated by the sight of a child being a child, past the age when her traditionally-schooled peers wouldn't be caught dead having that sort of fun. I honestly credit that observation with being one of the foundations of my intent to homeschool my own kids. No institution is going to dictate the age at which my children give up playing or dolls or princess movies. Neither will I stand in their way when they feel ready to move on to other pursuits.

I just spent most of 2010 teaching in a parenting program through the county hospital. As if articles and media hadn't already shown me enough about the type of lives "regular" families are living in America, this job has brought it home in heartbreaking detail. Our children are not respected. Their childhood isn't held sacred. Family life is breaking down at the speed of light. As a Progressive, I have to wonder what the "Family Values" people have been doing over the past decades? They claim to have the higher ground on that, yet there is no evidence that they actual value families. I live surrounded by Conservatives, and believe me, their children are not living better lives than the Liberals' kids in New England. Our entire society has lost sight of what it means to be happy, to be free, to be a child.

SOCIALIZATION ISSUES ANYONE?

2010-10-26T23:12:00.000-05:00

I've skipped some stuff I want to write about, but I will have to come back to them later. Today's adventures included getting soaked in the grocery store parking lot and being harassed by awayschooled kids (new term I'm trying out). We were busy and didn't start any formal school stuff until about 4:30pm. Between putting away groceries and sitting down together, the doorbell rang. It was a little girl from down the street. Alexander told her he had homework. Fifteen minutes later, the he was rounding and Kathleen was subtracting fractions. There was a knock at the door. I answered. It was Little Girl's little brother, asking if the kids could play (adorably, he asked for each by their name). I told him that they were doing school work. Ten minutes later, another knock. Little Brother again. I told him that they were still busy and might be out later. Next thing I know, he is standing at the window to our craft room/classroom, staring in at us. It didn't help that Grace was standing on the windowsill, gazing out. Ten minutes later, he knocked AGAIN! This time, I told him that the kids are homeschooled and might be working for hours (total exaggeration, but I was so tired of it).

Anyway, I thought it was my kids who were supposed to have socialization issues? My kids have never been so desperate for someone to play with that they lingered in their yard, knocked on their door four times in an hour, or stared at other children through their windows! The awayschooled kids on our street are playing outside the second they get off the bus. My homeschooled kids play outside all the time, but never with the sense of urgency their traditionally-schooled peers seem to. Perhaps because they spend endless hours doing what they enjoy and not what they are made to do???

SCRABBLE SLAM ALL THE WAY

2010-10-04T17:14:00.000-05:00

I'm not sure if I have mentioned Scrabble Slam before. Even if I have, it bears repeating: this game is GREAT. It's not often that you can combine fun and spelling/reading practice in a way that is as attractive to Mom and Dad as the kids. You start with a four letter word, and replace letters to create new four letter words. That's it. Everyone goes at once, although you can take turns if you have a new reader.

(No one paid me to write this...it's a totally free endorsement of a great card game!)

NEW YEAR, SAME OLD CRAZY

2010-09-26T16:09:00.000-05:00

So, school has begun with a whimper, rather than a bang. Due to family drama (extended family, not us), things haven't started out the way I planned. We are two weeks into the year and only managed "school" two days in the second week. Oh well, flexibility is one of the many reasons we homeschool. I have high hopes that Week Three will go a bit more like I want it to.

The Religious in our SECULAR group are at it again. There is already a Creation Science workshop planned. Husband wanted to lecture the group on the meanings of secular and science, but I reminded him that I have to see these people in person. Another woman decided to set up an exhibition of something called the Science Zone. I checked out the website, and the man seemed legit and straightforward, until I reached the bottom of the page. If you request it, he will add a Christian element to the lesson. I mentioned to the group that if they were going to add the slant, we wouldn't be attending. The mom in charge said she wasn't planning on it. A day later, she mentioned opening the event to other local groups to boost attendance. My nemesis of the past few years (Jesus and the Rocketship Lady) immediately suggested adding the Christian stuff to the class to attract the Christian groups.

At the urging of some like-minded people in my group, I have now joined the local Unschoolers group. On the spectrum from radical unschooling to strict "school at home" types, I would say we trend towards the unschooling side. Our parenting style matches up with their philosophies well, but our views on education differ. Since I've been told that the group is peopled with non-religious, progressively-minded members, I figure we will fit in just fine.

As far as the kids classes, they are going extremely well. Kathleen is now taking two dance classes a week, in order to be eligible to audition for the junior competitive dance team. Grace and Alexander are attending a weekly homeschool gymnastics class at the same gym he already went to last year. Kathleen and Alexander are also taking a wonderful art class once a week. In between all of that, I am working one evening a week with at-risk families on learning to be nurturing parents, and teaching a homeschooled sixth-grader math twice a week. This is the busiest we have ever been!

SPELLING PROBLEM, HERE WE COME

2010-08-27T12:35:00.000-05:00

I have mentioned before (okay, several times) that Kathleen's only problem in school is spelling. She has improved but is still nowhere near where she needs to be. Thanks to my friends at Secular Homeschooling, I have just been introduced to Spelling City! You can input your own spelling lists, and the student can practice, play games, and take tests on the site. Sounds fantastic, and I can't wait to try it out.

Another cool site SH shared is Read Print, which allows you to read and/or print books, essays, short stories, poems, etc. that are in the public domain. Looks like it will be an excellent resource this year, as Kathleen is in fifth grade. I imagine it will become even more useful as she progresses.

START DATE?

2010-08-23T15:00:00.000-05:00

School was supposed to start around here on September 1st. I was going to wait until after Labor Day, but then thought it would make record-keeping easier to begin on the first of the month. Then, I got sick. Mom/Teacher/Buyer/Principal being down for an entire week has set things back at least a week. I haven't purchased a single book at this point, the classroom is suffering from an extreme lack of tidiness, and the other odds and ends I'd hoped to wrap up are all waiting for me to get back on my feet. At this point, I'm counting on the day after Labor Day as our official start to the year.

The kids extracurricular activities run on the public school schedule, so we have already been thrust into the middle of that insanity. Kathleen had to miss one dance class last week, between her mother's inability to get off of the couch and her father's need to earn a paycheck. She did make it to the second one (she now takes dance twice a week). Alexander and Grace will be in gymnastics for the semester. That was going to mean to different trips a week to the gym, but the lovely facility is trying to get a homeschooling class off the ground. They will both have class, at the same time, during the day! Talk about a time/gas saver. Keeping my fingers crossed that enough kids show up to make the class work. I think Kathleen might take an occasional art class this semester; Alexander might be interested as well. We also have several field trips coming up...I already miss summer.

Personality Set for Life By 1st Grade, Study Suggests

2010-08-08T17:51:00.002-05:00

Interesting read.

THINGS THAT WORRY GRANDMA

2010-08-05T16:44:00.001-05:00

That her homeschooled grandchildren are not learning how to follow rules and directions and get along in an institutionalized setting.

Not quite sure what I am doing wrong with that...

How can relatives not understand that this is one of the many reasons we homeschool? I want my kids to grow up free and unfettered from the herd rules that are necessary in large schools. As a teacher, I accept that much of the structure of traditional schools is unavoidable with that many children to teach, care for, and keep track of. My kids live in the world. They know that we follow the laws of our country, state, and city. They wait in line at the store, just like everyone else. Most importantly, the know WHY we do these things. We have had countless conversations about rules and laws and what they do for human societies. Hell, they even know that animal species beyond our own have rules of their own!

As for "getting along" my children are complimented on their behavior wherever we go. That is not an exaggeration; we rarely leave the house without getting a comment from someone, somewhere. They are polite to strangers, they wait in lines without freaking out (except for Grace, but she's getting more patient all the time), they talk to one another and their father and I, they are excited about and content with whatever small enjoyment the day brings. Are they ever unhappy, sullen, or cranky? Of course (some more than others). Are they recluses who freak out at the sight of people other than their family and can't cope in new places? Absolutely not.

I concede that my kids may grow up to be non-conformist. They may balk at traditions and constraints that their traditionally-schooled peers take as a matter of course. On the other hand, maybe when they do attend a regular class, whether that happens in high school or not until college, they will find the situation interesting, rather than mundane.

MONEY, MONEY, MONEY

2010-08-01T13:17:00.000-05:00

I am currently scanning the internet in my yearly quest to find the perfect books for the new school year. Public schools start next week, but here at the AA, we wait until the original, official end to summer...Labor Day. I am leaning towards Singapore Math again, which I haven't used in years. I still really like the Kumon stuff, but in order to cover a year's worth of info, I have to buy like four Kumon books for each kid.

This will be the first year that I am looking at books for all three kids. In keeping with working at their own paces, I cannot keep Grace from beginning some preschool work. She is anxious to start. She already knows her colors, how to count, and recognizes some letters by sight. I guess we are on to memorizing the entire alphabet and numbers. Kathleen began to learn to read at age four, but Alexander waited until six. Grace will probably be ready somewhere in between, which means teaching her while reassuring Alexander (who is sensitive to such things) that everyone learns at their own pace, and it doesn't reflect poorly on him that his little sister can read at a younger age than he did.

Although it was great to discover that the state of Louisiana finally gives homeschooling families a tax break (for the record, I'm all for taxes) by refunding half of everything we spend on education expenses up to $5,000. Since we have been paying taxes to send our children to school, but not actually using the money they set aside for our children, the refund seems more than fair. Some states and parts of Canada actually give the homeschooling family their allotted money to spend on education, but we'll take what we can get. That means that we'll get back half of what I spend now, but not until next February or March. Until then, I have to take a deep breathe and spend, spend, spend on workbooks.

I just discovered The Secular Homeschool Community online, which you'd think I would have found years ago. Seems like a great place for info and support for those of us who aren't basing our children's education on the Bible. Sadly, even a website with "secular" in the title cannot escape the Religious and their inability to understand that any mention of their faith, beliefs, or lack of scientific knowledge is NOT SECULAR. I was scanning a forum dedicated to finding non-Christian science curriculums. That's something I'm also on the hunt for, so I began reading. What they really meant by "non-Christian" was that it is okay to believe the fact that the Earth is billions of years old, but not okay to talk about the fact of evolution. How is that secular?

TWO WEEKS TO GO

2010-05-17T14:14:00.000-05:00

School ends in nine days. The kids are counting down, the teacher is freaking out. It's pathological how the doubts come sneaking in at this time every year...did I cover everything? did we work hard enough? can I really have kids this old? I've bowed to the pressure (sort of) to the all powerful, high-stakes test known as the LEAP. Since other kids in Kathleen's grade had to take it to go on to the next year, I decided to at least administer a practice test to make sure she's somewhere on the spectrum. Honestly, I know that she is, but the coward in me wants to prove it; even though I don't consider standardized test any kind of real proof. Insane, right? At least I manage to keep the psychosis from my kids.

My plans for the summer include continuing to read American history with Kathleen, and having Alexander read at least a book a day. I don't want him to lose any ground with reading, since we've worked so hard all year to get him where he is today. Do you know how difficult it is to teach reading to a child who is constantly trying to prove you wrong? Today, there was a battle because I told him that "all" in a word is always read "ol". His book had him read "alligator". You can see the problem.

We are embarking on a two week long road trip Yellowstone National Park. The kids have already begun a journal for the trip, and my plan is for them to write a bit on each day. I can't wait to see how they turn out. Everyone is wildly excited about the trip, and we have spent plenty of school time researching things online, watching documentaries, and pouring over maps. We leave the day after school ends!!!

SO MANY OBJECTIONS, SO LITTLE TIME

2010-04-22T11:45:00.001-05:00

http://m.apnews.com/ap/db_16029/contentdetail.htm?contentguid=zNndXXl2

Schools don't want parents taking their kids out for one day? Not even a day when the parents actually share not only a glimpse of real life, but also a glimpse of what the parents spend most of their time doing? The worst part is that their rationale revolves around "high stakes testing". What, we don't even pretend kids go to school to learn anymore? We go straight to the test-taking? The lack of deception is a bad sign to me because if the schools don't think there is more to an education than can be standardized, then we are hopeless. If they can talk about it in the open, without fearing that parents will object, then we have reached a new low as a society.

-- Post From My iPhone

Sir Ken Robinson: Do schools kill creativity?

2010-04-14T22:23:00.000-05:00

NEW CLASSROOM

2010-02-03T13:10:00.001-06:00

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

VALIDATION IS GOOD FOR THE SOUL

2010-01-19T16:43:00.001-06:00

I may have mentioned before that Alexander is shy. We had no doubt when he was four/five that if we had thrust him into a traditional school, he would not have reacted well. Another facet of our "go with the flow" approach to both parenting and education is that we never pushed him into extracurricular activities. Kathleen has been in dance for years and Grace started in the fall, but Alexander always declined our offers of classes he might enjoy. That changed at the end of last summer when HE decided to take gymnastics.

Except for the lack of boys in his class, Alexander has loved gymnastics. The place I chose teaches Acrogymnastics (think acrobatics). They focus more on using the body to perform tricks, rather than lots of equipment. Alexander has happily attended his classes, practiced his moves at home, shown off to relatives, and all around been a great success.

The great Let Our Kids Decide When They Are Ready for things expirement culminated last week when Alexander's class had an exibition to mark the end of the semester. My shy son, who has always hated to be put in the spotlight (unless he wanted to be there) was amazing. Group display? No problem. Solo trick of skill? Breezed through. Feat of daring? Stood on his coach's shoulders as calmly as could be. This was all with an audience of at least twenty adults staring at him.

It felt good.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

THIS TIME I MEAN IT

2010-01-12T00:20:00.001-06:00

Last year, I mentioned that we were going to switch our upstairs classroom with the downstairs playroom, but we didn't go through with it. Just before Christmas, I decided that it is the right thing to do. We will get more done at one time because the computer is downstairs. I will be able to work on other things during school, when Kathleen is doing stuff on her own. Grace will have more options for entertainment. Now, I just have to go through the insane amount of work it will take to actually move all of the stuff!

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

JESUS IS MULTIPLIED

2010-01-09T01:47:00.001-06:00

I understand that many families who choose to homeschool are extremely Christian. I understand that the All-Inclusive homeschool group I belong to includes some of these families. What I don't understand is why anyone who is so Christian that they can't offer a multiplication tutoring program without both including and advertising the "five minute devotional" that will precede each lesson would want to belong to an inclusive group. There are several All Christian All The Time groups in town. Are the families who seem to tolerate the non-religious in our group trying to spread the Word, or do they truly not see that Jesus and multiplication facts don't automatically go together?

I know that to some, I might be stuck on the topic of Christians in the homeschool group. I really am surprised and annoyed every time this happens. I would never join a Christian group and then hold a Buddha/Reading Lesson, that would be rude and pushy (I'm not buddhist, just an example). I did belong to the local Catholic homeschool group for a year. When they prayed before PE every week, I bowed my head out of politeness (and conditioning from Catholic school). I accepted that part of the group and never brought up topics that might lead to religious disagreements. Why don't the religious families in our group extend the same courtesy?

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

MORE USES FOR MY IPHONE

2010-01-08T00:43:00.001-06:00

I know I'm beginning to sound like an Apple commercial (I happen to be a PC who loves iPods and iPhones), but I remembered more applications that the kids use. Google Earth has many educational uses and is just plain cool to use. Touch Physics in another amazing app. Alexander really enjoys that one and uses problem solving skills, creative thinking, and a basic understanding of the laws of physics.

I have to admit that I just downloaded an app that allows me to blog from my phone. An entry about the joys of my iPhone inspired my search for a blogging app...I am a giant nerd.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

HOMESCHOOLING? THERE'S AN APP FOR THAT

2010-01-05T22:34:00.000-06:00

To begin, we need to go back to December 2008. I received an iPod Touch for my birthday (I love it so much that I find it necessary to capitalize the name). We already have a wireless network in our house, so it was easy to check email and update my facebook status from the luxury of the couch, or bed, or back porch. It didn't take me long to start searching the App store for more than just the Koi pond and Tetris...I realized that there had to be educational apps that the kids could use. This year, I received an iPhone for my birthday because I am such a giant nerd that going without the internet in between my house, my parents house, and hotels was too big a burden. That, and after using my mom's to instantly email a photo from Disney World to my sister-in-law opened my eyes to the beauty of the unlimited data plan. Anyway, I have now downloaded several useful educational apps for the kids.

Flashcards are boring for both the teacher and the student. Flashcards on a handheld computer are wonderful. It sounds simplistic, but the immediate feedback of sounds and colors makes the work seem fun for the kids, and the computer keeps track of the answers so the teacher doesn't have to. Kathleen's multiplication facts are kept fresh through several sessions a week with the iPhone. Alexander loves practicing adding and subtraction on it too. Last month, I discovered a great app (Flash Racer) that allows up to four players to compete in math facts! Alexander sticks to + and -, while Kathleen and their older cousin use the x and / cards. It keeps track of the time it takes, as well as the percentage of correct answers to create a running total. I have also enjoyed TriFacts, which presents simple math equations within a triangle to show the properties of reciprocity while they work (2 + 3 = 5,
3 + 2 = 5, 5 - 2 = 3, and 5 - 3 = 2).

GeoMaster is excellent for practicing geography; I have actually been learning a lot. Apparently, I don't know where any of the tiny countries in Europe are, I'm worse in Asia, and almost hopeless in Africa.

I have probably mentioned that spelling is Kathleen's Achilles heel, and I have even found an app for that...Scrabble! She already loves to play the board game, and the iPhone version comes with us wherever we go. She and I play while her brother has gymnastics and her sister has dance class, we play on vacation, we play in bed before falling asleep. There's nothing like the drive to beat your mother at a word game to make a nine year old want to spell :)

PROJECT INDOCTRINATION

2009-11-04T15:20:00.000-06:00

Well, the good, old homeschool group is at it again. A newbie is setting up a visit from Project Creation to hold a Creation "Science" Workshop. You know, they have kids dissect frogs and owl pellets and talk about how God was so kind as to create owls to vomit up such educational pellets for us to study. So far, she has half a dozen interested parties and no location to hold the workshop. She's looking for a church because, as we all know, the best scientific discovery occurs in such places.

My husband wants to "call the group out" over this, but I have been argueing against it. First of all, the group is actually labeled as All Inclusive, which means that we take all types. Secondly, I am the one who sees these people face to face, and I don't want to be viewed as a troublemaker. I can't help but wonder, though, why we need to be All Inclusive when we are the only non-religious group in our area. I did join the email group of a truly secular group located on the South Shore, but we haven't managed to get over there to attend anything or meet anyone.

I think that the only way to combat this sort of thing is to set up a workshop teaching the basics of evolution and offerring it to the group. Perhaps my indignance at having fake scientists claim to be teaching scientific falsehoods as facts will finally compel me to get things going.

HANDWRITING

2009-09-19T22:24:00.000-05:00

I distinctly remember when I was in the third grade that I simultaneously received a U for unsatisfactory in handwriting AND won the award for best handwriting in my class. This article discusses the decline of cursive handwriting and whether or not we should mourn its loss.

FALL = BUSY

2009-09-17T23:59:00.000-05:00

We haven't quite gotten into the swing of doing all of the following activities, but here's a schedule of what I plan on being involved in within the next month:

Monday: 4-4:30pm Grace's Ballet Class
5:30-6:30pm Kathleen's Jazz Class

Tuesday/Wednesday: various field trips with homeschool group

Thursday: 4:40pm Alexander's Gymnastics Class

Friday: Park meet up with homeschool group and Presentation Day once a month

Saturday: 10am Both Girls' Rehearsal for Xmas Show

This is all in addition to doing school work every day of the week. I frankly have no idea how parents of traditionally schooled kids manage to fit in any extra-curricular activities (or cook dinner, or clean, or do anything other than shuttle kids from place to place).

Alexander had his first gymnastics class today, which is a big deal. He hasn't participated in an organized activity (other than the short-lived science club last year) since he was three years old. We have offerred classes or sports activities every year, but he has always declined. I know plenty of parents who would think we were being weak in allowing him the choice. The way we look at it, we respect our son as an individual and will not force him to participate in things that make him unhappy or uncomfortable. Rather than creating a little hermit, I am proud to say that with our method, when he chooses to do something social, he does it well and without reservation.

This past weekend, the kids were all invited to a birthday party next door. I had planned to go to supervise Grace, but we have all been suffering with a horrible cold since our vacation. The older two were improved enough to attend, but I didn't want to descend on the neighbors with an entire family of viruses. I told the kids that they could go on their own, which Kathleen was completely fine with. Alexander backed out. A half hour into the party, Kathleen had to dash back for something. When Alexander saw his sister sporting fake dogs ears, with her face painted to match, he reconsidered his decision. He went off with Kathleen and had a blast.

Gymnastics was a similiar experience. He chose to join the class, checked out the gym yesterday before I signed him up, and was wildly excited all of today. He kept checking the time and counting down to class time. As soon as we arrived at the gym, he joined the class with no hesitation. Afterwards, he declared it a success and can't wait to go back next week.

ONE WEEK DOWN, THIRTY-FIVE TO GO

2009-08-31T11:26:00.002-05:00

We are one week into school and already packing for a vacation. Not because we need a break already; some things aligned that necessitated a visit to the cousins. Our actual, long-planned trip will be at the end of the month when we go on our annual pilgrimage to Disney World. That gives us half a week of school now, then two and a half before we leave again. Have I mentioned that I adore homeschooling and the freedom it affords?

So far, Kathleen isn't covering any new material in her school work. Homeschooled or not, all students go through the review period at the beginning of the year. Alexander, on the other hand, has hit the big time. The new reading book I chose seems to be working; by Friday, he was reading "A cat sat" with no problems. Whether it's his innate ability or a better phonics/reading instruction book or me (having learned from my mistakes), Alexander is already sight reading the words. The first few times through, he sounded them out, but after that, he remembered! It took longer for Kathleen to be that effortless, which might not have been the case if I hadn't started the poor thing when she was only four.

I am still struggling to get the kids out of their summer routine of staying up late and sleeping in, which I'll admit is more because I can't break out of that pattern. It doesn't really matter, except that field trips and other activities will be picking up soon, and those things always start in the morning. Waking up three groggy kids is not my idea of a great start to extra-curriculum activities.

SCHOOL CREEPS CLOSER

2009-08-12T17:17:00.002-05:00

In my last post, I said kids shouldn't have to attend school in 90 degree weather. I was apparently low-balling the temperature around here. It was officially 94 degrees on the first day of school for public school students. While they sweltered, the kids and I celebrated the relative quiet at the neighborhood pool. Our days are numbered, though, because I've finally settled on a date for the first day of school at the Almaz Academy. We will begin classes on August 24th, which is earlier than I'd wanted, but what I decided made the most sense. If we finish too far past the public schools, we will have a cousin spending the night while Kathleen and Alexander are still supposed to be in school.

My giant box of workbooks arrived from amazon last week, and the kids and I had fun flipping through them. Somewhere on my path to spend the least amount of money possible, I totally overlooked Grace. Not that she needs school books, but she would have loved to get a new story in the mail. Poor baby kept asking which of the many books was for her. A couple of days later, I took her to the store and let her pick out a "school book" of her very own, which made her happy.

Even with our later start date, the fall activity schedule is hitting us now. Kathleen is signed up for dance, which begins next week. Both she and Alexander will be enrolled with a new sports organization that is offering indoor soccer. I am waiting for the registration info to come in the mail for Grace's gymnastics class. I also want her to attend the weekly class for kids her age at the Parenting Center. I am committing us to at least one park day a week with the homeschool group. I would have loved to sign up for the PE class because they seem to finally have it together in that department, but the cost is too high. It is done through the local YMCA, and even with the discount for homeschooling families, we can't really swing it right now.

Summer's not even over, and already I'm beginning to miss the aimless days...

GEARING UP FOR FALL

2009-07-24T12:54:00.002-05:00

Public schools begin in two weeks down here, which I find so amazing. No child should have to head off to their assigned institution in 90 degree weather! They sweat at the bus stop, they swelter at recess (good thing they only get 20 minutes a day to socialize), they melt during PE (only once a week; gotta keep America fit), and they fry on the bus ride home. Sounds very educational.

Now that I've gotten that out of my system; I've been slowly putting together lists of the books and materials the Almaz Academy will need to begin the 2009-2010 (I can't believe I just wrote 2010) school year. Kumon must know about my homeschooling plans and my love of their books because every year, they expand their materials to a higher grade level. I have a dozen Kumons listed on my amazon wishlist at this very moment. I am working on finding books about history and science at the moment because math and grammar books are a dime a dozen. I read over the state's grade level expectations for the fourth grade, and it looks like Kathleen has finally hit the big time.

Alexander has been taking a bit of heat this summer for not knowing how to read, and some of it has come from him. While we were on a trip with his cousin, the subject came up among the kids. Cousin and Kathleen announced that they learned to read in Kindergarten. They weren't being judgemental, but Alexander suddenly realized that he's finished with K and can't read. I pointed out that lots of kids don't read before 1st grade, and that he will be learning this year. I thought the matter was settled until my mom brought it up (negatively) the other day. Not to sound too smug, but I have a MASTERS IN EDUCATION. If I say that kids learn at different speeds, then darn it, they learn at different speeds!!! I don't question other family member's knowledge in their given fields, and I demand the same courtesy. Did I say any of that ? Nope, I just said he'd get to it and changed the subject. I know, I'm a giant wimp.

I have promised myself that this year, I will not hit the local educator's store with the kids in tow. The older two aren't too distracting (although the store is connected to a toy store), but Grace makes critical decision making impossible. Some Saturday in the very near future, good old Dad can watch everyone while I shop for this years materials.

We are currently in limbo on the adoption, but if a sweet little baby makes his or her appearance this school year, I have many ideas on scheduling. I'm generally a fly-by-the-seat-of-her-pants kind of homeschooler, but juggling a newborn and three year old in addition to my two students will require some structure. I like things loose; I don't enjoy total chaos.

THE LIBRARY?

2009-06-29T11:50:00.002-05:00

I have confession to make: I avoid the library like the plague. Despite the fond memories of trips there as a child (especially in summer) to load up on books, as an adult, I am not a big fan. My first issue is with the fact that I always end up with late fines. I take most of the blame for this, but I do have to lay some of it at the feet of fate. Even when I make a good faith attempt at returning books on time, fate intervenes. For example, I had a stack of books at home when I was put on bedrest during my last pregnancy. I explained to my husband that they were due in a few days time. I reminded him that I was barely allowed to walk to the restroom, and driving was out of the question. He agreed immediately that he'd return the books. I actually saw him carry them out to his car...and found out two months later that they were still there. For a fine of $25, I will just buy my books at amazon, thank you very much!

My second issue is small children. I have had a toddler for years now (what happens when you keep having kids), and toddlers are not the best company at the library. I used to take the kids (when I only had two) to the story times at the local branch. They enjoyed it, but Kathleen always expected to check out some books afterwards. It is extremely difficult to browse books when you have a two or three year old whooping and running around. Noise and libraries don't mix, and young children and quiet can't coexist.

I am at a turning point today. Kathleen has suddenly begun devouring entire books in a day or two. She has a new interest in the Titanic, thanks to a Magic Treehouse book she fell in love with. On Saturday, we bought her the companion Magic Treehouse research book on the doomed ship. By Sunday afternoon, she'd finished all ten chapters. As a family, we enjoy owning books. Mom and Dad are well known for reading favorites again and again; we are not one time readers. We have lots of fiction and even more non-fiction on the shelves of our personal Library (who needs a formal living room anyway?). I don't begrudge Kathleen her own collection. On the other hand, if she's going to breeze through books at this speed, maybe it's finally time to revisit the public library. If we wait until the weekend so that Grace doesn't have to come with us, and I leave Kathleen in charge of remembering when to return the books, then maybe we will finally succeed!

IT'S SUMMERTIME (ALMOST)

2009-06-11T11:21:00.002-05:00

Well, the public schools are out for summer...kids in the street all day, my nephew spending the night several times a week, etc. The Almaz Academy is not finished for the year, though, which is driving me nuts. I wanted to be finished before my husband's family visited en masse, but that didn't happen. Then, my mom asked the kids and I to accompany her to visit my grandmother in Florida (days after my in-laws left). This week, Kathleen had dance camp, which is her first experience with day camp. A week from Saturday, we're having more company! What's a mother/teacher/principal to do? I've made the command decision to wrap up everything next week in an intense, end-of-the-year blitz. After that, we will have a celebration for Alexander's completion of kindergarten (we had a tea for Kathleen when she finished the big K). Then, I'm free for weeks and weeks; no more planning out lessons for two whole months!

Kathleen and I have had some good discussions since she began dance camp about homeschooling vs traditional schooling. She likes that she is spending the days with friends, but she also understands that traditional school isn't quite like that. She is getting the fun parts (packing lunches, hanging out, dancing) and none of the rest (homework, eight hour days, silent seatwork). Getting up for camp is a killer because we are late to bed, late to rise kind of people. When I told her that schools start three hours before she has to be at camp, her eyes bugged out :) She has said that she'd like to go to a regular high school, which is fine, but I think her idea of high school revolves entirely around the High School Musical movies. If only the reality was as fun and friendly.

When we started homeschooling, one of ours goals was to raise kids with self-confidence who could take any situation in stride. So far, Kathleen seems impervious to peer-pressure. Given a couple more institution-free years, I think we will have reached our objective. Alexander is a completely different kind of kid, so it will be interesting to see how long it takes for him to reach the level of self-assurance we think will help our kids get along in the world.

FUTUREKIND

2009-05-14T08:29:00.002-05:00

I saw a photo online the other day that was so offensive that it's taken me this long to even write about it. Given that the Internet is overflowing with dirty, scary, gross, and horrifying pictures every single day, what could I have seen that shocked me? A new, Japanese robot teacher. Apparently, she has already worked well as a receptionist and secretary...sorry all hard-working secretaries of the world. You are easily replaced with an android. I can't even imagine a robot being a better secretary than a person, and now they are promoting Ms. Roboto to teacher?

It's kind of obvious from the fact that I homeschool at all that I believe there are many bad teachers out there in our schools. Would I rather a machine teach children? No Way. There are plenty of women who went into education as a way to earn a supplemental living (let's face it, how many families can depend on a teacher's salary to support them in America?). Teaching appealed to these women because they'd have holidays and summers off with their own children. I am not the only person who entered the education field because his or her skills lie in communicating with and teaching children. We became teachers because we were good at it and wanted to make a difference in children's lives. For the Japanese, or anyone else, to say that we are easily replaced by machines is insulting.

Another bit of educational news floating the Web this week involves all of the states currently considering allowing guns on college campuses. Are we headed towards a future where our children are instructed by robots and carry weapons to class? Doesn't that sound like a Doomsday scenario rather than progress?

LOUISIANA TO SCIENTISTS AND HIGHER LEARNING: GET OUT AND STAY OUT

2009-04-20T23:17:00.002-05:00

There have been a string of Louisiana-related insanities that have me wondering if the citizens of my state are awake. First, a giant conference of scientists boycotted the state because of the governor's refusal to put a stop to Creationist language in an education bill. By now, you've all heard Jindal speak...it's hardly a surprise that he doesn't understand basic scientific concepts. But wait! He has a biology degree from Brown! Apparently, he thought he was majoring in fiction.

This week, a senator introduced a bill to our state legislature that bans any human/animal hybridization. He was asked to do so by the archbishop in New Orleans. Louisiana is totally out of the closet on its refusal to abide by separation of church and state. The archbishop and senator seem to have missed the fact that people have been getting pig valves in open heart surgery and that many medications are derived from animals (horse urine anyone?). I insist that if the law passes, all people with animal parts or hormones should be quarantined.

Today, another senator proposed that the state cut funding for the merit-based scholarship program. If he gets it through, then even kids who are awarded the highest level of the scholarship will not be receiving full tuition to LSU and UNO. LSU pointed out that they cost a bit more (like $500 more) because they have higher admission standards. We now want to tell smart, motivated kids that they can't go to the best school the state has to offer after they worked hard through high school to reach that goal?

What if these things are all part of a larger plot to homogenize Louisiana into a certain type of person. Step One: Teach children a non-scientific version of biology so that they cannot compete in universities or the work force anywhere else. Step Two: Don't let scientists work on cures for diseases using sound methodology so that the population of Louisiana doesn't have the same life expectancy as anyone else. Step Three: Don't let the smart kids attend the best school, otherwise they may grow up to overthrow steps one and two.

We have got to move.

INTERESTING ARTICLE FROM ENGLAND

2009-04-08T14:43:00.001-05:00

http://www.guardian.co.uk/education/2009/apr/08/scrap-homework-say-primary-teachers

WHO'S ON FIRST

2009-04-05T23:20:00.003-05:00

So the other evening after work, Dad took the kids outside to ride bikes in the cul-de-sac. There were various other children playing too, including one who I will call "Dennis the Menace". Dennis innocently asked Kathleen where she goes to school. She told him that she does it at home. He looked at her like she hadn't heard him correctly and asked her again where she goes to school. This time, Dad jumped in because he could see that Dennis was confused by Kathleen's answer. He told Dennis that the kids do their school work at home. "But where do they go to school?" Dennis asked again. Dad repeated his answer. Dennis said, "But where do they go for part of the day?" Dad tried to explain it again, but Dennis had given up. Either he thinks we're nuts, or we've just blown his mind.

SURPRISED TO BE HERE ALREADY

2009-04-01T23:20:00.003-05:00

When we first discussed homeschooling, I had an imaginary cut-off date in the back of my mind. It was part safety net, part goal, and I'd think about it periodically over the years. Schools are different all over the country (and even within individual states), so my line in the sand was fairly arbitrary. In our county, kids attend "elementary" school for Kindergarten through third grade. Then they move up to "middle" school, which is fourth through sixth. After that comes Junior High School for seventh and eighth, and High School for the rest. Of course, that's just the public schools; the private ones often have different ranges. When Kathleen started Kindergarten at home, I figured that I'd at least homeschool through "elementary" school and then reassess the situation.

It is now April of Kathleen's fourth year of school. Registration is beginning soon for the public school system, and I have no intention of signing her up to attend one of their facilities for the fourth grade. I was startled to realize where we were on my timeline and am very grateful that I didn't publicize the possibility of traditional schooling to family. Certain members would already be nagging me to "stick to my original plan", even if it wasn't so much a plan as a general guideline.

I cannot deny that being completely in charge of the education of two of my children is a lot of work. It also comes with plenty of stress because of the responsibility I've placed on my own head. I would by lying if I said that I didn't believe that we've made the right choice though. The kids are happy, the kids are learning (even if Alexander still enjoys using Stealth Learning from time to time), and the kids are still kids. I taught "middle" school, so I know that fourth grade little girls are into boys, makeup, dances, and acting like mini-teenagers. My husband and I are not naive, and we don't expect our children to act like kids until they get out of college. We just want them to enjoy themselves and follow their own interests and hearts as long as they can without the crushing affect of peer pressure. My kids choose their clothes based on their own tastes, not the tastes of the kids in class. They play imagination-based games, watch cartoons, play outside, etc. Kathleen is making older choices than she did a year ago; she's transitioned slowly from Disney Princess to High School Musical, but she is currently reading her way through all novels written about fairies. She has a new fascination with big budget, slightly scary, adventure movies (The Mummy anyone?). She still loves fancy dresses and baby dolls, and no one in her school would ever tease her about that.

To anyone who would say that the world isn't always nice, I would agree with you. It isn't nice. Why would I ever throw my children out into it earlier than absolutely necessary? Getting a shot hurts, but I don't practice it by jabbing them with needles before we reach the doctor. They will probably get their hearts bruised, if not broken, as teenagers, and being teased by boys and girls who act like they are twenty in the fifth grade isn't going to make the pain any less in the future. My kids will enter that "real" world (as if spending all day in an institution is "real") with self-confidence and the knowledge of what is really important to them.

OUR FIRST FIGHT

2009-03-13T00:52:00.003-05:00

While I am still firmly in Obama's camp when it comes to almost everything, I have to disagree with much of what he said this week concerning education. My difference of opinion doesn't stem so much from my position as a homeschooler as my training and education as a professional educator.

Obama is pushing for states to open PreK to more students (the Head Start program). As I've argued before, there are plenty of children out there who benefit from being in a safe, caring, educational environment at an early age. It doesn't all come down to income, but the children targeted by Head Start do come from poorer homes. By talking about the educational benefits of 4 year olds attending institutions, the President and other supporters of widespread PreK are ignoring the socioeconomic reasons behind those benefits. It's almost as if there is nothing to be said for being at home with your family in your formative years, even if your parents are willing and able to spend time with you.

Merit-based pay for teachers is a thorny issue and not because teachers are afraid of hard work. I agree that the tenure given to teachers who work for a district for a certain amount of time (three years where I live) is a negative drain on our education system. I would argue, though that this is because of the teachers still working who began their careers several decades ago. Teaching was seen as a suitable job for women, and many joined up so that they'd have holidays and summers off with their own children. When I was in college and grad school, I felt the full force of the fight of modern teachers to be recognized as true professionals. We had to show society that we were intelligent, capable people who studied learning styles, child psychology, and cognitive theory, in addition to classroom management and discipline techniques. I was not trained to teach math, I was educated on how children learn so that I could facilitate their learning math. I am on board with ending tenure to ensure that only the teachers who view their work as a profession are left in America's classrooms.

Merit-based pay would have to be based on something, and I'm afraid that would be standardized tests. America does not recognize the expertise of teachers and individual schools. If a child's teacher isn't good enough to assess their progress, then why do they need teachers at all? I hear that Japan is testing a robot teacher, which is all you need to train kids to take standardized tests.

What if you have a student who struggled to even earn a passing grade in math, but moved up to making C's with you? You might feel pride and joy for that student, and you may even get a letter from her grandmother telling you that no teacher has ever done as much for her granddaughter. What if that one school year (9 months) with you wasn't enough to help that child perform well on a multiple choice standardized test, and she ended up scoring about the same as she had the year before? Does the fact that she can solve problems that she didn't even understand before, or that she now has the confidence to try harder in all of her subjects, or that you put in the extra effort to help her learn not count at all? Will your pay be docked or at least, not raised based on that child and others like her in your class?

There are so many other factors in a child's life that can help or hinder him/her besides their teacher, that I don't think it's quite fair to base a teacher's pay on his/her performance. Unless we take children away from their parents at birth and give them to the teachers to raise, those teachers do not deserve all of the praise or blame that comes from the way children learn.

President Obama also mentioned the possible need for more classroom time and a longer school day. I really wish he would read one of the many books available by respected educators on this subject. There have been schools who lengthened their school day and raised scores (on standardized tests of course). All of the ones I've ever seen were in extremely poverty-stricken and dangerous inner-city parts of America. A great deal of those children's success had to come from the healthy food, safe environment, and attention they received at their schools. Children whose health, safety, and emotional needs are met at home are not in need of those things from an outside source.

To me, a lot of these issues stem from the type of family a child is living in. There are wonderful low-income parents and terrible rich parents. A one-size-fits-all education is not beneficial to individual children, and it never will be. There is a fine line between helping kids in need and dictating educational policies to all kids.

"NO CHILD LEFT BEHIND" CONTESTED

2009-02-23T16:36:00.002-06:00

Check out this blog, which is having a contest to rename the "No Child Left Behind" Act :)

FRAMED AS A PUNISHMENT

2009-02-15T19:46:00.002-06:00

I have had it with the frame that certain members of my family view our choice to homeschool through. You see, these people believe that homeschooling is something we are doing to our children, while I see it as something we are doing for our children. See the difference? For example, "When will you let Kathleen go to school?" First of all, Kathleen is in school. If she wasn't, I'm pretty sure I would be breaking the law, not to mention that I would be a horrible parent. Second, that question implies that Kathleen is keen to attend a traditional school. This is the girl that says she plans on being homeschooled forever. I have brought up the idea of attending a traditional school with the kids before, and I have flat out asked them if they want to. They both say no. Alexander is shy, so that's not a surprise, but Kathleen is very outgoing. I keep tabs on whether she feels isolated or wants more time with other kids, and so far, she is very happy with the way things are.

Do my relatives really think this is the easy way out of educating my children? Gee, the burden of being completely responsible for whether or not they learn anything is nothing! I am selfishly coming up with lessons, guiding their education, and making sure that they socialize enough. Why can't I be less self-centered and send them off to a place where other teachers can do those things for them?

Another thing these negative framers don't get is that my husband and I have actual reasons for not putting our kids in traditional schools. I never really go into those reason in detail with my family because they get defensive at ideas contrary to the ways they raised or are currently raising their own kids. They don't even realize what is normal kids behaviour a lot of the time. For goodness sake, my own sister keeps spreading stories about a crush between Kathleen and a boy she sees maybe once a month! My daughter is eight years old...kids that age do not naturally pretend to be teenagers. When they are institutionalized and spend every day together, their natural inclinations get distorted. Rather than pretending that their Barbie doll is dating Ken, they have boyfriends and girlfriends in their class. I don't agree with the way that some people raise their kids, and if I place my child in constant company with theirs, things rub off. One of the things I find most refreshing about homeschooled kids is that they act like kids longer than their traditionally schooled counterparts.

I have gotten comments about the extra-curricular activities schools offer. Um, my kids would be in an elementary school. I was a teacher in this district, and there are not many opportunities for enrichment available to school kids at that age. Besides, Kathleen takes dance, drama, and cooking classes. Does she sound like a kid who is being shortchanged in the "extras" department?

How am I supposed to respond when someone implies that we are taking something away from our kids without sounding defensive or judgemental about the questioner's choices? I want to point out that I have a Masters in Education, so I know a thing or two about education and kids. I want to scream that my kids are happy and never complain about being homeschooled. I want to shout that much of the time school kids spend in the classroom is spent on discipline, classroom management, and filler.

What do I do instead? I change the subject.

2009-02-08T15:01:00.002-06:00

Teacher quality low in Louisiana, report says

Gee, who could have predicted that the trend towards less teacher-led teaching and more administrator-led teaching would have a negative impact? Who needs high quality educators when you really want automatons who will obey your every whim? Frankly, teachers don't need a college degree to make sure that they are all on the same page, on the same day for every school day of the year.

I am annoyed that the article makes no reference to the pay scales in Louisiana and Mississippi. It is insulting to expect educators who went into the field with the dream of helping children learn (and who are intelligent and motivated individuals) will stay in jobs that pay them nothing and afford them no respect. When you allow bureaucrats to determine what a teacher does for the entire school day and don't pay them enough to make that their sole source of income, you cannot complain when you don't get top quality. The good teachers either move out of Louisiana and Mississippi or stay in the states and find a different career. Hopes and dreams of helping children can only get you so far. Even the most noble among them have to eat.

UPDATE

2009-01-31T13:50:00.002-06:00

Alexander is doing well with remembering his letter sounds, and he has begun learning sight words. He can read the word ate :) I created "sentences" with pictures and the sight word to help him practice and give him the sense of pride that comes with being able to read. This is all going way slower than using the phonics book to teach Kathleen to read, but I think that we will all be happier in the long run. He is a whiz at addition and subtraction, so math is going well too.

Kathleen is currently learning the names of the seven continents and a bit about each one. We studied deserts last week and learned that Antarctica is technically a giant desert. Kathleen's reading choice at the moment is a non-fiction selection of dinosaur facts. She started drama classes this week, still attends dance, and will be starting back with the cooking classes next month.

GETTING THE MESSAGE ACROSS

2009-01-19T13:08:00.002-06:00

As I sit here at the computer, I am beside myself with glee. Today is the last day for all of time that I have to say that my president is George Walker Bush. Tomorrow, so many wonderful ideas and changes will come together with the inauguration of Barack Hussein Obama. I want my kids to understand this amazing event, but I think I've done too good a job at raising them for them to really get it ;)

We watched the movie Hairspray the other night with the kids. We had to explain the whole segregation theme to them. I have talked to them about it before, but we discussed the concept again in regards to peaceful marches and the Civil Rights Movement. The thing is that it isn't just because they didn't live it that they need to be reminded. My children, and hopefully many more American kids across the country, simply do not see the color of a person's skin the way that their parents and grandparents were raised to. I think that my generation of parents are the Gateway between segregation and institutionalized racism and our children, who see skin the same way they see a person's hair or eyes. It is simply a physical characteristic and does not indicate what sort of character they might have. When we mention to the kids that the baby we hope to adopt will likely be of a different skin color than we are, they look at me like I'm crazy. Kathleen pointed out, "Mom, none of us have the same skin color." She's totally right because she and I have olive skin, her brother is slightly lighter, her father is fair, and her little sister is peaches and cream. If her new brother or sister is darker than the rest of us, he or she will simply be as different from us as we already are from each other.

On a non-race related note, neither kid understood that Miss Turnblatt (if that's how you spell her name) was treated cruelly because she was overweight. We have made sure to make body image a positive thing, and only talk about weight in terms of health (we exercise to keep our bodies strong and healthy, we eat healthy food for the same reasons, etc.). Since the character was dancing her heart out (exercise) they saw nothing wrong with her. We did not point out the prejudice people held against her. Neither one of us wanted to bring that to their attention. They thought the mean girl and her mother were just jealous of Tracey's dancing ability.

Now I am faced with the task of marking tomorrow in a meaningful way for my children. We are going to watch the inauguration on TV, but I want to do something more. The day is much bigger than what we can see on television.

DID I MISS THE PART WHERE JESUS WALKED ON THE MOON?

2009-01-12T15:55:00.002-06:00

We are gearing up for the first ever meeting of our homeschool group's new science club this week. The kids are excited, the mom hosting the event has already separated the kids into groups based on ages, and I am mentally preparing myself to prevent Grace from destroying a stanger's house. Then I checked my email this morning and read:

"Is anyone offended by putting a Bible verse in a lapbook?"

Excuse me? I don't think it's nuts that I didn't anticipate Christianity rearing its head during a SCIENCE club meeting being held by a NON-RELIGIOUS, ALL-INCLUSIVE homeschool group. The mom who posted the question is teaching Alexander's age group on Wednesday. The topic? How to build and launch rockets.

I am really trying to come up with a way to ask the woman which Bible verse pertains to rockets, in a way that doesn't sound rude or offensive. No one else has addressed her question all day, and I have to admit that I don't want to be the first one. I mean, if we are talking about praying for a safe ride when you are actually in a rocket that's launching into space, then I see the relevance.

The only religion I can see that involves rockets might be Scientology. Maybe I should find a verse from them to include in the lesson...

DEEP BREATHS

2009-01-09T22:36:00.002-06:00

I swear if I do any more deep, cleansing breaths during school time, I will fall into a trance! Alexander still will not commit all of the letters of the alphabet to memory. These kids are determined to make me face my true feelings about child-lead learning. On the one hand, so what if he can't name each letter on sight? Kathleen only got there with daily drills with flashcards and the promise of ice cream when she got all twenty-six right at one sitting. I haven't done that with Alexander, and I'm sure that it would motivate him if I did. Why haven't I? Because I realized that it was kind of silly to have done it before. Kathleen would be reading right now whether I'd done the flashcards or not. I am taking a more organic approach to Alexander's reading future.

I pulled up the Dolche List of Kindergarten Sight Words the other day because I am trying to successfully mingle the Whole Language Approach with Phonics. They had practice pages that looked at the words as shapes ("all" is a word with a short letter followed by two tall letters). The child looks at blank boxes (one for each letter in a word) and fills them accordingly. He had no trouble with that. I downloaded a fun App for my Ipod Touch for him to practice letter recognition and letter sounds. It even lets you trace the letters with your finger to practice writing. I know that flashcards do a similar job, but this is way more fun and attention-getting.

Kathleen will not spell to save my life. I have never met a kid who loves to write for fun more (except for me), but she leaves spelling behind every time! I have begun to realize that without the threat of a bad grade, she does not have any incentive to do it correctly. She knows that I will give her the correct spelling when we edit, and she's fine with that. Plus, her writing is honestly so creative that her father and I praise the stories and imagination in everything she writes. Who cares about spelling when you are getting rave reviews. I know that a traditional third grade teacher would not be so thrilled at Kathleen's work. He or she would never get past the first sentence and realize how great the story was.

I may have to pull out the big (and boring) guns next week. I wonder what would happen if I circled the misspelled words, but didn't give Kathleen the correct spellings. She can look them up in a dictionary (probably online). Maybe the prospect of tedious extra work will encourage her to pay attention to her spelling things right as she writes? I haven't tried something like that before because I didn't want her to become one of those kids whose writing is stifled by their need to only use words they were sure they could spell. I believe that she is safely past that point now...

AWESOME WEBSITE

2009-01-05T22:00:00.003-06:00

I have to write a quick post to highly recommend Multiplication.com. The interactive games are wonderful. Kathleen regularly practices her times tables and doesn't look at her multiplication table every few seconds like she does when doing pencil and paper exercises. Many of the games have a built in reward (getting to design a fairy wonderland in one).

IT'S ALL RELATIVES

2008-12-31T00:27:00.002-06:00

It's the holidays, so I get to have my annual chats with various relations about homeschooling. My favorite question goes something like this, "How do you know that they are keeping up with the kids in their grade in school?" It is a valid question to someone who is truly curious, but when it is accompanied by a knowing smirk and I have to answer it every single year, it becomes annoying. My answer always involves immediately pointing out that when I was a "real teacher" in a "real school" I was always handed a list of Grade Level Expectations at the beginning of the school year. It was a list of things the students needed to know or be able to do by the end of that year. For some reason, though, the smirk doesn't really go away, even after I explain that the GLE's are available for download on the state's department of education website. Am I somehow less qualified to follow the guidelines with my own children than I was with the thirty children of strangers?

The big question is-why interrogate me as to my abilities to educate my children when you can glance over and see my third grader writing a short story for fun or my kindergartner engrossed in a science pop-up book?

AH, THAT XMAS SPIRIT

2008-12-16T23:53:00.002-06:00

It's Christmas time, which is apparently the perfect season for our homeschool group to lose its mind. Way back before Halloween, there was a blow up because someone stated that she didn't think that non-Christians would want to hang ornaments on the group's tree...She could not handle it when someone posted a link to a true history of winter holidays and the Catholic Church's role in moving the birth of Christ from the Spring so that it coincided with the much-celebrated Winter Solstice. Anyway, she wanted to theme the tree "Homeschooled Angels". The group didn't agree because we are supposed to be all-inclusive. Why this woman doesn't just join one of the several religious homeschool groups in our area, I don't know.

Guess what happened in the first week of November that the rest of us only found out about today? This mother formed her own homeschool group. Guess what it's called? Homeschooling Angels. I am not kidding. Guess what the questionnaire says? Exactly the same things as ours does. Guess what their mission statement says? You guessed it; it is a copy of our group's mission. Guess who wasn't invited to join? Most people in our group, even though the HA's claim to be all-inclusive as well. Here's the kicker: the founder claims that none of this has anything to do with the tree fiasco. She also claims that her group isn't there to compete with our group. That's an impressive claim, as her park day is the exact same one as our group's park day. She also planned a field trip to the same place we are planning to go, but a week earlier.

So far, she has told two people on our email list that they do not understand the situation. Who needs reality TV when they can just sit back and watch our homeschool group implode?

KEEPING MY MOUTH CLOSED

2008-12-03T11:16:00.005-06:00

A close family member brought up a topic the other night that I hold a violently different opinion on. It's a topic that I hold dear to my heart, one that shaped the life I lead, and one that effects the entire country every single day. No, it isn't religion; it is the nature of education. This relative was a teacher for like thirty years. Does she understand the gravity of her position as a teacher? Does she even think that teaching is a profession? NO and NO.

I was treated to a monologue about how unfair it was that she, an English Literature Major, was not allowed to teach first grade until she had taken some education courses. She went on about how she was more qualified to teach six year olds to read because of her major than someone who spent their entire college career taking Ed classes. Hello, she was at my college graduation...I have a Bachelors and Masters in Education! Besides being obnoxiously rude and insulting to me, her entire argument is so backward and screwed up that I don't know where to begin.

In what world is it better that someone who read a bunch of classic literature and analyzed it to death teach tiny children how to turn a bunch of symbols on paper into something they can understand? The two are not connected by more than the word "reading". I spent four years of undergrad and another in grad school learning how to TEACH. I know how to break things down for kids to understand, I know how to facilitate their learning, I know how to encourage their interests in a direction that will lead to them being better educated.

The hideous saying, "Those who can do, and those who can't teach," is ignorant. What I can DO is TEACH. Not everyone is good at guiding children, just like everyone is not cut out to be a doctor. I agree that I want my high school teachers to be a specialist in their subject. I want a science major teaching science and an English major teaching English Lit. By the time children reach high school, they should already have the skills in place to learn; if not, they weren't taught well in elementary school.

While I sat there and listened to my profession, my education, and my expertise being dismissed as not important, I was faced with starting an argument or letting it go. I could see my husband struggle with the same choice because he shares my beliefs. In the end, I decided that it wasn't the time for a lengthy discussion on the subject, and so did he. He did make one comment, but she is so firmly stuck to her convictions that she did not understand what he meant...

THE BUGATORIUM

2008-12-03T10:51:00.003-06:00

We finally visited the Audubon Insectarium last week. In our family, it's known as the Bugatorium. Kathleen named it that because the facility showcases more than just insects (spiders and worms anyone?). We had been waiting for the kids' aunt to visit and join us in our bug adventure, which is why we skipped the homeschool group's recent field trip.

Everything about the Bugatorium was cool, except for the price. It cost our family of five $60 to enter; they charge for everyone aged two and up. I hope that the price for school field trips is substantially less. Everyone wonders why schools in New Orleans are so low performing, but no one questions the prices charged by educational facilities in the city. Low income families are being priced out of sharing learning experiences...

Anyway, after we handed over our pile of gold to be admitted, we were immersed in the amazing world of bugs. The theme was well-executed, which is high praise indeed coming from someone who visits Disney World at least once a year. There were more live bugs than fake, which was a big plus. There were all sorts of creatures we had never seen, and the size of some of the insects was astounding. We were all surprised to discover that there is a species of Leaf Cutter Ants that makes its home in Louisiana and Texas, and delighted in watching the little guys cut down leaves and bring them into their mound. There was even a camera mounted in the leaf chamber of the ants' home.

The cafe, which served up food both regular and bug-filled, was great. We didn't eat anything, but we explored the menu. The tables themselves were awesome, since they were actually terrariums that housed giant spiders and beetles (not together). There was a walk-through area that shrunk guests down to bug sized and let them explore under fallen leaves and underground. The trapdoor spider that jumped out at us sent Kathleen into a tiny screaming fit, but she enjoyed the whole thing. Grace refused to enter the dark area at all.

The best part of the Bugatorium (to me) was the butterfly garden. It was filled with a huge variety of live, free butterflies. I'm kind of astounded that they let kids in the garden and wonder how many of the beautiful creatures meet their end when a field trip group stampedes through. Our family carefully avoided squashing anyone as we enjoyed the wonderful display.

Even the gift shop or "Flea Market" was nice. There were plenty of items in the super cheap range, so we allowed the kids to each choose something small. Days before we went, Alexander had said, "Oh, I hope they have stuffed spiders!" because they are a new obsession. As soon as we entered the store, I saw a soft, brown spider who managed to be both spidery and cute at the same time. Daddy snuck off to buy the toy for Alexander's upcoming birthday, and Alexander was none the wiser. The best part is that he didn't even see the display, so he doesn't know that his wished-for toy even exists.

All in all, we had a great time. If anyone out there has money left over after they buy food and pay their mortgage, I highly recommend visiting the Bugatorium.

ANOTHER POINT FOR KINDERGARTEN

2008-11-21T00:41:00.002-06:00

Yesterday, Alexander was completing a page in his math workbook. It involved subtraction but was laid out in a silly way. Instead of 7-3, it would say 7 take away 3. Alexander cannot read, and neither can most children in the book's target age range. It is far easier to teach a child the minus symbol than to expect them to read. The workbook's failings are not the point of my post though. I pulled out a jar of glass beads (the kind people use in vases of flowers and stuff like that) that I purchased to serve as counters in math. I told Alexander to use them to solve the problems. He went to work and had a blast! While he subtracted, he muttered, "I sure do like Kindergarten!"

PATIENCE IS A VICTIM

2008-11-19T11:26:00.003-06:00

I've long held the belief that patience is a victim of modern schooling. Teachers simply cannot be patient with each child when they have a herd of them to educate. The ability to let a student learn on his/her own schedule has been sacrificed on the alter of efficiency and standardized testing. What I'm realizing as a homeschool teacher is that the lessons I learned while teaching large groups are hard for me to break. I talk a good game about letting Kathleen and Alexander do things at their own pace, but I will admit that I am sometimes so frustrated inside that I literally feel my patience being strangled to death by my need to be in control. So far, I've been doing a fairly good job of keeping that internal struggle to myself. If I was going to try and force my kids to learn on someone else's timetable, then I would send them to a traditional school.

Kathleen's only real issue is spelling. The kid still can't spell to save her life. She has now written an entire twelve page book, and I still have to help her edit it within an inch of its life (all spelling errors). She is so creative and imaginative and artistic (sounds like bragging, but it's all true), and I think this lack of interest in spelling rules comes from that. She spells things phonetically (I've already complained that I shouldn't have relied on Phonics to teach her to read). She can read a ten chapter book, but if I ask her to spell "cat" I promise that she will sound it out in her head before answering!!!

Alexander can write his numbers, write his name, add and subtract beyond his grade, but ask that boy to count from eleven to twenty and you get, "eleven, twelve, thirteen, eighteen, fifteen, sixteen, eleventeen, twenty!" EVERY SINGLE TIME. He is not forgetting and messing up; he is consistently counting the same way. How in the world did the wrong info get so stuck in his head? The logical part of me says that he will eventually get it right. He is bright, and he will not go off to college thinking he's eleventeen years old. The part of me that worries about what other people think hopes that no one asks my son to count for them.

Yesterday, I learned a great way to deal with my insecurities about my kids' internal learning clocks...a homeschooling mom who is a friend of a friend was talking about this very subject. Guess what? Her children aren't necessarily learning what she wants them to, but that's okay because they are learning what God wants them to. I have my own strong spiritual beliefs about the Universe, but they do not involve a supernatural being planning out curriculum. It would be easy to announce that Kathleen cannot spell because it is God's Will. That statement alone could set back the homeschooling movement a decade. It is hard enough to be this different from mainstream America without people sharing these sorts of beliefs in reference to their children's education.

I think I can interpret this sentiment, though, and it matches up with my own. I may want Kathleen to spell everything correctly, but concentrating only on that might stifle her creativity. If she wrote her stories always worried and writing only words she was certain she could spell, how could she learn to be a writer? I intentionally never put her in an art class where they would show her how to draw or paint because I don't want to limit her own artistic style. Some of the moms yesterday were talking about how their children hate writing, and one concluded that all kids are like that. Tell that to Kathleen, who is currently working on her second book :)

WOW! WOW! WHAT A CROCK!

2008-11-08T23:31:00.003-06:00

My youngest, Grace, has developed a fondness for the Nick show "Wow! Wow! Wubbzy!" I thought the graphics were cute and the stories innocent, so I let her watch it sometimes. Kathleen and Alexander enjoy it too. I have come to realize that little Wubbzy is a terrible example. He is constantly getting into trouble and then out of it without ever making things up to whomever he's wronged. For example, a friend wasn't home, so the postman brought a package to Wubbzy's house. Once he realized that the package contained a train set, he lost all self-control and opened it. He played with it until he dented and scratched the engine. He tried to cover up what he'd done, but the friend found out. It then turned out that the friend had planned on giving Wubbzy the train all along. Not only did nothing negative happen to Wubbzy for opening someone else's stuff and destroying it, but the other friend offered to fix the train engine good as new! That basic story line is repeated in episode after episode.

The one on right now has Wubbzy hearing negative things from other little animals about school (new people, no play time, mean teacher). He decides that he doesn't have to go to school and will teach himself everything he needs to know. As a homeschooler with an understanding of unschooling (even if I don't follow that philosophy with my kids), I sensed a trap. First Wubbzy went to the library to learn things. The problem was that there were too many books...Then he went to his inventor friend who made him a Robot Teacher. Things went haywire with the robot...Finally, Wubbzy went to the park to play with his friends, only to discover that no one was there...Where were they? In school of course! It turns out that school is fun! This insulting little cartoon, that obviously intended to calm preschool fears about school, is pushing an agenda. Children aren't smart enough to know what they need or want to learn, books aren't a good source of information, and the only way kids have fun is by all going to school together. I know, it's just a cartoon. The problem is the overall tone of the thing. I've seen plenty of cartoons and read many children's books that deal with the subject of starting school. There are plenty of ways to play up the positives and excite kids without being condescending. Besides, from what I've seen, Wubbzy would be in detention in about five minutes for his antics.

What is the moral here? Don't let the kids watch this show. The Backyardigans, another Grace favorite, are full of fun stories and music. I think we'll stick with them.

E DAY

2008-11-04T00:03:00.004-06:00

Let me start by saying (as if it weren't already obvious) that the Almaz Academy officially endorses Barack Obama for President of the United States of America. We have bravely driven through our Conservative town for over a month now with two Obama stickers on our minivan. We have parked in the Wal-mart parking lot and wondered if the back window was going to be smashed in when we returned (not a crazy fear since many of the other cars in the parking lot sport Confederate Flag stickers on a daily basis). We have been honked at in a decidedly nasty way by lots of people. In this election, we refuse to be cowed by the opinions of our fellow citizens. We believe that there are others out there who feel the way we do, and even if we can't see them, they too are supporting the Obama/Biden ticket. Except for Bill Clinton's two wins, our families have always been on the losing end of Presidential elections. Tomorrow, I am hoping that my kids will get to feel the pride that comes in knowing that there are other Americans who share their family's values and beliefs.

We have kept the ugliness of the McCain campaign away from our children. They do not know that the GOP has worked to label Obama as a Muslim and imply that anyone of that religion is a terrorist. They are too young to have to bear the burden of that ignorance, especially since their grandfather and many relatives they know and love are Muslim. Kathleen and Alexander do not know that Palin and her ilk keep using Obama's middle name in a derogatory way, which happens to be almost identical to their grandfather's first name.

On Election Day, I will educate my children about the importance of voting (we early voted over a week ago) and the insane method by which Americans choose their president. We will talk about the historical basis of the Electoral College, its failings, and why it is obsolete. We will also talk about why no one has bothered to change it. We will study the geography of America and watch the way the states vote. In the end, I hope we will celebrate the America we know is out there, but haven't experienced. When you've lived in "Real" America your whole life, "Fake" America sounds like the Promised Land.

SUGGESTION FOR TLC

2008-10-29T12:41:00.002-05:00

An email came around my homeschool group this week concerning a new mini-series debuting on The Learning Channel. It stars a family of homeschoolers who recently sold their house, bought a camper, and drive around the country permanently. That sounds like an interesting life to me, and I guess it appeals to other families, which is why TLC decided to film the family's adventures. I believe that they discovered them on the family's travel website. I am reluctant to tune in to the show. The email I received starts out with the mom telling us that she is LDS. The fact that she used initials instead of the full name or the more commonly used title of Mormon turns me off. This is not some club for Christians. At this point in America, homeschooling families come from all walks of life and religious backgrounds. I had to google LDS to figure out that it stands for Latter Day Saints.

Dear TLC, There are families who live interesting lives and homeschool who are not Christian! There are families who are Christian, but did not choose to homeschool based solely on that fact, and who do not feel the need to trumpet their belief system ahead of all other facts about themselves. TLC features the mega-family, the Duggars, on their channel. They homeschool their children, and they also wear old-fashioned clothes and hair styles. Seen alone, you can accept that they are one type of homeschooling family. When set next to other extremely Christian homeschooling families on TLC, it sends the message that only these types of families live this lifestyle. You guys can't find a hippy family living on a farm who homeschools, eats organic food, and doesn't go to Church? You can't keep showing one extreme without showcasing the other too. There are plenty of us in the middle who are being stereotyped every time you air an episode. Please TLC, find someone who homeschools for social or educational reasons and not to add religion to every school subject.

WHAT LESSON DO I WANT MY DAUGHTERS TO LEARN?

2008-10-24T15:20:00.003-05:00

I am reading a book called I'm Chocolate, You're Vanilla: Raising Healthy Black and Biracial Children in a Race-Conscious World by Marguerite Wright, a psychologist. I bought it because we are in the process of adopting a bi-racial or African-American baby, but after beginning the book, I realized that it's a must for all teachers and parents.

The chapter I'm currently on has a section about hair care for African-American girls. The author points out that many hair styles common among African-American girls and women take hours of often painful work to accomplish. She discusses the message that sends to girls about their appearance and what is more important-their comfort or how they look? I've always been careful when answering my oldest daughter's questions about makeup when she sees me applying some. I don't want her to believe that I do it to be pretty or because I'm supposed to. I never wear much anyway :) The hair thing is an extension of that. The author also mentions that in the African-American community, there is often use of the terms "good hair" in relation to how straight a girl's hair is naturally.

I decided to post a question to a bulletin board dedicated to adopting African-American children. I have been surprised by the responses, especially as I've referenced a noted psychologist and her observations. Apparently, my future daughter (if the baby is even a girl) will be teased in Kindergarten unless I braid her hair. I was told that it only takes about an hour or so to braid a little girl's hair. I can't even get my two year old to stand still long enough to brush her silky, easy to comb locks. How in the world would I get her to sit still for an hour long session? I was also told that it doesn't matter if my family doesn't believe that appearances are the most important thing about a person. My child will suffer for my beliefs.

According to Wright, who is not only a psychologist who has worked in Social Services, but also an African-American woman and a mother, when children are little, it is their parents beliefs that hold the most importance to them. It is also the parents' reactions to racism and bigotry that protect their children from harm. Here I am educating myself about ways to raise happy children with high self esteem, and I'm doing something wrong because Kindergartners tease?

I posted that I am homeschooling, but I'm sure that won't sit well with the women on the bulletin board. I've gotten the impression that whatever happens in African-American families is what I, as a trans racial adoptive parent, should be emulating to raise my adopted child. Hello, I'm not even following the guidelines of what my Caucasian neighbors and acquaintances do to raise their kids! Wright points out that a lot of the negative self-image that young children develop comes from their African-American parents. One example was, "Get your black butt upstairs," which sends the message that "black" is a bad thing. I certainly am not going to emulate that.

I think the women on the board thought I was all talk when I said things like free-spirit and raising kids to have self-worth that isn't overly dependant on their appearance. They immediately shot back with ways that it wouldn't work. Luckily for my children, I truly believe the things I said. My eight year old loves to do her own hair. If they saw some of the styles she comes up with, and I happily let her wear in public, they might understand. She is blissfully unaware that strangers might think her appearance is unusual. If you say to her that it isn't the way other people do their hair, she will answer, "So?" That's my girl.

TAG-YOU'RE ILLITERATE!

2008-10-22T00:17:00.004-05:00

I could have sworn that I wrote about this already, but I couldn't find it when I scrolled through old posts. Even if I did, the commercial I'm fired up about could do with more abuse. I'll preface this by saying that I understand the appeal of the product. There's no reason that kids can't enjoy it. It is the way it is being marketed that has driven me crazy.

Yesterday, while my kids were watching a cartoon, we saw an ad for the TAG learning system from Leapfrog. The commercial features a man dressed up like a frog standing in front of a table piled with books. One of them is opened to a page covered with illustrations of amphibians and what looks like descriptive information. The others are all TAG compatible books, full of characters like Spongebob (a sea creature I have nothing against). Children are lined up to try out the new TAG system, which is a pen-shaped computer. The kids run it along the text in the special books, and the computer reads them aloud. The frog-man points out that the books are even read in the character's voices (who needs those pesky imaginations anyway)! He then makes fun of the non-TAG books and points out that it can't talk.

Really, Leapfrog Corporation? We're now so officially against literacy that we will sell a toy claiming to promote children learning to read by making fun of books? What is at the end of this literacy rainbow? Hey kids, learn to read so that you can sit quietly with a non-verbal tome; it's loads of fun! The commercial dissed an actual book! With frogs in it! A book that my kids saw during the ad and said, "Hey, that looks like a cool book!" That book? Apparently, my kids are too old fashioned. They think learning to read opens up a world of adventure, information, and knowledge. Boy are they nuts!

I'll make my prediction now. In the next few years, Leapfrog will come out with TAG books aimed at older kids. It will continue until seventeen year olds are taking the SAT's with handheld computers that ask the questions in Spongebob's voice.

THE BACK SEAT SCIENTIST AKA MY GENIUS SON

2008-10-19T21:57:00.004-05:00

I'm not one of those people who enjoys driving. Maybe it started when we moved twenty minutes out of town so that we could afford to buy a bigger house. It takes fifteen to twenty minutes to get anywhere I want to go. The only exception is Kathleen's dance school, which is a shocking five minutes away. The only thing that makes it bearable is listening to music, even the kids' cd's will do. Sadly, that comfort is often lost to me because my dear son is always inspired to talk about science while I drive. For example, the other day, he wanted to discuss the center of the Earth being made of "melted rocks". Other times, we've talked about why he wouldn't want to visit space (too dangerous) and how a parachute must work (air pushes up on the fabric of the chute while your body is pulling it down). Since there's no way that I am going to discourage him from talking about his interests and discoveries, I turn down the radio and listen.

Another story that highlights my son's apparent genius, he came up with an idea of figuring out where a friend lives that blew me away. He asked if we could make sure to have paper and a pen with us the next time we saw this boy. Since Alexander isn't quite up on addresses yet, he devised his own method of exchanging the locations of his home and this other little boy's. He suggested that we ask the boy to draw a map to his house from Wal-mart, which is someplace Alexander assumes everyone is familiar with. We would then draw a map to our house from Wal-mart for the boy. That may not sound like a brilliant idea, but if you know much about children's cognitive development, higher level thinking skills, and creative problem solving, your jaw would be dropped right now ;)

WHAT'S WRONG WITH SCHOOL VOUCHERS?

2008-10-17T01:26:00.002-05:00

What’s wrong with school vouchers is a question posed by John McCain in the last presidential debate. He smirked and pointed out that Washington DC had 1,000 vouchers available and 9,000 parents applied for them. He indicated that the numbers meant that the vouchers were a good idea, and that Barack Obama was simple if he didn’t understand that. What flashed through my mind was the question of what happened to the 8,000 kids who didn’t receive a voucher? They had to stay in whatever schools they were districted for, which probably weren’t that great if their parents were applying for vouchers to get them out. School vouchers are a quick fix to appease a public that is seemingly powerless to improve the education of its children. It’s like the owners of the Titanic bragging about the fact that they don’t have enough lifeboats for everyone on board-”We can save some of you, so get in line!” The idea of vouchers is that the parents who complain the loudest about crummy conditions at their local school are the ones that will line up first for a chance to send their kids somewhere else. Once they are satisfied, politicians don’t have to deal with actual school reforms.

I taught public school for three years. With a Master of Education degree, I was earning $29,000 a year when I left. I’ve heard the argument many times that teachers, “Only work nine months out of the year.” If we go with that argument and adjust my salary to see what it would be were I to work for twelve months a year, I would have earned $38,666. Wow, I would have been rich! Wait a minute, that isn’t a lot of money either. As a public school teacher, I was required to arrive at work thirty minutes before the children. I was required to stay after work for duty, for meetings, for conferences with parents, for conferences with special education teachers, for planning, for paperwork, to make copies and prepare for the next day. I was required to attend Open School Night, School Beautification Day, the Walkathon, Family Math Night, and Technology Night. As a condition of our governor’s “pay raise”, I had to work two Saturdays a year. I had to begin the school year three days before the students and end it two days after. Who else but teachers would put in that much time above and beyond the regular work day on a regular basis for such small compensation? I had to deal with unhappy parents every single week and not because they thought I was a bad teacher. Parents complained about other kids in the class, parents complained about things other kids in the class did at the bus stop or on the playground, parents complained about the curriculum, parents complained about the dress code, parents complained about the school’s Tardy Policy, parents complained about the lunch times, parents complained about the amount of homework their children had to do (some said too much, while others said not enough). Teaching is like having a Performanc Evaluation Meeting EVERY SINGLE DAY. You never knew when you’d have a special note in your box to deal with a parent or when your principal would spring a Parent/Teacher/Principal Conference on you (at least if you had my boss, who once famously announced when questioned about having a Pepsi machine in the teacher’s lounge, which no one liked because everyone drank Coke-”I have a deal with the Pepsi Corporation, and that’s all you need to know.”) Does this sound like a job that people want? I love working with kids. I sometimes think fondly of returning to teaching, and those daydreams center around my students. The rest of it can be too much to deal with. The year I finished grad school, I read an article that stated that fully one half of all first year teachers switch careers after that first year. Saying that we need to pay teachers more in this country isn’t just pandering or a waste of money. You cannot expect people to work day in and day out following a million rules and dealing with the public and not pay them a professional wage! If I want to take crap from people and make no money, I will work for the DMV. Do we want bright, professional educators in charge of our children (and our future), or do we want bitter, unhappy teachers? I have actually had to argue with a family member, who became a teacher because it seemed like a good way to be home with her kids during the summer, that teaching is a profession. She views it as drone work. Do you want people who feel that way teaching your child?

With No Child Left Behind, schools earn their funding through test scores. You realize, don’t you, that this means your children are actually working for their public school education. If they don’t pony up and regurgitate the right facts at the right time, then they don’t get books and computers and healthy school lunches. By this method, schools with lower test scores actually receive less money. How exactly does this help them improve? I live and worked in a high performing school district (if you believe standardized test scores are a true measure of intelligence, which I do not). I know of several schools that scored 98% on the NCLB standard. Guess what happened to them the next year? They were required to improve their score in order to secure their funding. How can you improve significantly when you are already nearly perfect? Figure out which kids are doing poorly and ask them to move? Dose them with an infectious disease so that they miss school the week the test is administered? The district had to resort to silly methods of bringing up the numbers. They realized that many children don’t come to school on the Thursday and Friday of Mardi Gras week (Monday through Wednesday is already a school holiday). Since attendance figures in school’s overall score, they extended the school year and made the Mardi Gras holiday last all week. Are the kids smarter now?

Our district also adopted what I like to think of as the Robot Teacher Model. Everyone who teaches sixth grade English, for example, must be on the same page of the same book every day of the school year. Remember that occasional teacher who worked outside of the textbook, coordinated her lessons to match the seasons or current events, and made learning fun? Don’t worry, she’s been replaced. Your children are safe with teachers who may as well have never gone to college because all they are required to do is make sure that your children know which page they should be reading. A common misconception of parents, politicians, and people who went into the education field to have summers off is that teachers’ only use is to drill certain facts and figures into children‘s heads. I am not an expert in fourth grade arithmetic or seventh grade grammar. What I learned in college and graduate school was how children learn and how to facilitate that learning. I don’t know everything, but I’m awesome at helping kids understand new concepts. Those professional skills are useless in the face of the Standardized Test juggernaut and Robot Teaching.

In my graduate program, we simultaneously interned and worked on our Masters Thesis. We also interned part time during our senior year. That means that I got a full year and a half of practice teaching in before being turned loose in my own classroom. My first placement was in a high performing elementary school in a predominantly white area of Baton Rouge. That year (1996) was the scene of East Baton Rouge Parish’s big integration push. I know it’s hard to believe, but even though schools were legally integrated decades before, no real work had been done to racially balance Baton Rouge schools. A large part of the reason was geography; Baton Rouge’s neighborhoods are largely segregated by race, so school populations reflected their neighborhood’s racial make up. I understand the desire for racially mixed schools, but it seems extremely impractical and counterproductive to bus small children forty-five minutes across town and away from their own neighborhoods just for the sake of the numbers. Plus, being southern Louisiana, the district knew that they would be in for a fight if they insisted on bussing white students into African-American neighborhoods. What was the solution? At schools like the high performing one I was interning in, they allowed African-American parents to register their children on a first come, first serve basis. I don’t know how many slots they made available, but I do know that they went fast. The district agreed to bus these children to the school. That solved the issue of getting African-American students into a white school. In a move that embodies a whole range of Wrong, the district decided to place all of its Gifted/Talented programs in African-American schools (by African-American schools, I mean schools that were literally 99% African-American because that’s how divided the parish was). I don’t know what happened parish-wide, but I witnessed what happened at the school I worked in. One of the teachers I was assigned to had been the school’s Gifted teacher. She did not move with the program to a new school in an African-American neighborhood. Instead, she had secret meetings with the parents of her Gifted students. She agreed to enrich their regular education so that the kids would not have to attend those other schools. A prime example was math class. She seated the eight Gifted students at a table on one side of the room, with the other twenty kids in desks on the other side. I (the intern) taught the twenty “regular” kids one lesson, while she taught the Gifted kids a more advanced lesson. I have no idea what the long-term successes and failures of the integration plan were, but it wasn’t off to a great start.

What our education needs in terms of reform is too detailed for me to create a comprehensive list. It will include treating educators as professionals and paying them for their expertise and willingness to work in the trenches day in and day out for the good of our children. It needs to recognize excellence in teaching, and not just pay more for better test scores. It will not only fund high performing schools, but focus on funding the ones who are struggling. It will recognize that the single biggest indicator of a school’s success depends on the population its students come from. Rich districts perform better across the board because the parents are themselves better educated. They read to their kids, they expose them to enriching activities from a young age. You cannot compare students from a rich neighborhood and a poor one until you recognize that the lower income kids need more from their school from day one. They deserve to be given a chance to achieve, and that chance starts when they are small. Reform also needs to place more responsibility on the backs of parents. It is not up to your child’s teacher to mold them into adults. They are there to aid them in their educational journey, not teach them basic manners and human decency. That is the job of parents.

I happen to believe that a lot of our educational programs are detrimental to the learning processes of children. I have chosen to home school my own kids (at least when they are very young) to avoid the push to conformity and suppression of natural curiosity and imagination that I have witnessed going on in schools. Schools have become strange institutions that not only fail to educate and excite our children about learning new things and expressing their own ideas, but also breed a lack of respect and dignity that I cannot accept for my kids.
It is nearly impossible for a single teacher with thirty children crammed into one room to truly ignite the spark of learning for all of them, while maintaining order and filling out the lunch order form on time every morning. Teachers are forced to teach to the middle (advanced kids get bored and struggling kids get left behind), mediate in only the most serious of behavioral offenses, and spend every second that the kids are working independently to fill out paperwork. Add to that the fact that half of the class may be taking prescribed mood and behavior modifying drugs, and you have a recipe for disaster.

Smirking and winking and acting like school vouchers are the solution to our educational disaster is either an attempt to swindle the American public into accepting a coat of paint on an derelict house as a renovation, or a fundamental lack of understanding of the complexities and true needs of America’s children.

THE SWING VOTE

2008-10-11T23:24:00.003-05:00

We had a week off of school for our annual pilgrimage to Disney World. On the very day we returned, Alexander demonstrated his skill (completely self-taught at this point) with addition. He grabbed a piece of paper and a pen, and wrote 2 + 2 and beneath that a 4. His pride and feeling of discovery was infectious. I introduced him to the = symbol, and he wrote 2 +2 = 4 over and over. He showed it to his grandparents and hung his page on their fridge.

Meanwhile, the kids have a long-running game with their cousin about an alternate land ruled entirely by children. They make rules, have their own currency, and are slowly developing their own culture. Kathleen and Alexander can't escape the fact that Mom and Dad are caught up in the Presidential election; Kathleen drew a "Go Obama" sign for our fridge the other day. What is interesting to me is that she took her understanding of the election process to the next level by beginning one in Kid World. She spent half an hour last night writing a speech (she's running for President). Today, I overheard her campaigning hard to a friend of her cousin, while her cousin wasn't there. I can only assume that she was extending the right to vote to this kid, but since he won't be around on Election Day, I think she was wasting her time (unless she's already drawn up an absentee ballot?). It turns out that Kathleen, Alexander, and their cousin are all running for the post as President of Kid World. Sadly, that leaves one eligible voter-Grace. I don't believe that you can find a more Independent/Swing Voter than a two year old little sister.

My dad got into the action, and the kids each gave a speech this afternoon. Kathleen's platform had something to do with rebates. She offered two million Kid World gold coins to anyone who lost all of their money. Alexander said that he would make sure that everyone had enough money to buy fruit. Their cousin announced that he would be a fun president, and that he would take time out of his office to create new games and activities. I don't know how Grace is going to choose between her love of games, coins, and fruit...or what the Kid World procedure is in the case of a three way tie if it turns out that Grace sleeps late and forgets to vote on November 4th.

TEACHING RIGHT FROM LEFT

2008-09-24T14:42:00.002-05:00

I have mentioned before that I belong to a secular homeschooling group, rather than one of the many religious ones in my area. I naively thought that this would introduce us to more like-minded families. Instead, I find myself in the same mine field I have lived in my entire life. Until I met my husband and his family, my family were the only non-religious, Democrat people I knew. The news talks about a county divided, but here in south Louisiana, people are united in the conservative, Republican belief system that seems to defy logic and reason.

I have never asked some of my fellow group members why they belong to a secular group when they are so devoutly dedicated to one religion or another. Maybe they want diversity for their kids. Whatever the reason, I find myself in a knot of frustration this election season. I read interesting articles on the issues but am afraid to post them to the group. What if I offend the conservatives in the bunch? How do I even know who they are? I can't even imagine the headaches that would come from posting a political poll to them.

This time around, we have gotten braver than we've ever been politically. I put an Obama bumper sticker on my minivan, a pin on my bag, and my husband wore an Obama t-shirt when we ran errands last weekend. It doesn't matter that the other side outnumbers us a million to one. We have valid arguments in this election, and we truly believe in who we are voting for.

I just read an essay about McCain's anti-regulation policies, and how he isn't being called on it. Do you know what a recent argument I heard in favor of voting for him was? That Nostradamus predicted the end of the world if Obama is elected. I am not making that up. How can I teach my children to respect the opinions of others and ways to debate without insulting if this is what the opposition presents to me? I do not respect people who throw PROPHECY into my presidential elections. I will not teach my children to lie.

We have talked about moving away from this state before, and I believe that we will in the near future. I don't want my kids to grow up in such a culture of ignorance and intolerance. If that makes me "elitist" then so be it.

A DAY IN OUR LIFE

2008-09-19T01:55:00.002-05:00

School went well today. Alexander is proving me right with the Whole Language thing. I made flashcards with the names of family members to help him memorize, which I hope will balance out learning his letter sounds. He recognized five out of ten cards today after only two days :) He'd only seen them three times before he could identify half.

I went a bit strict with Kathleen's spelling lesson because it is her one weakness. By weakness, I mean a mind-bending lack of attention to spelling rules of any sort. When I introduced this week's words, I made her write them several times instead of the once that the book suggested. I had her repeat today. Afterwards, I gave her a practice test, and she did fairly well. This all goes against my education philosophy, but I don't want poor spelling to hold Kathleen back. She writes amazing stories, but some people wouldn't get past the spelling. Phonics have enslaved my child, and she can't seem to break free with only my "in your own time" methods. Hopefully, third grade will be the year that she throws off the choke hold.

After school, we headed off to my dermatology appointment. As we walked up to the office building, we passed a shiny, orange SUV with a McCain sticker on the back. That caused me to wonder what my children would learn if they saw Mom key a stranger's car in the doctor's parking lot. I decided that it wasn't a lesson I wanted to teach; after all, if I wanted to endorse intolerance, I would vote Republican.

Once we were seated in the waiting room, a little boy came over to play with Alexander. He was seven and full of energy. He was also an accomplished liar. The kids all started discussing Lego Star Wars. Since I'm the one who played every single level with my son, I know a bit about the game. He's played it a lot without me (I can only stand so much), but his Wii is in the living room, so I'm around when he does it. I witnessed the intense quest to earn enough money (after all, isn't that what Jedis fought for?) to buy all of the characters, including the expensive and invincible ghosts. At this point, Alexander owns all of the characters and has $4Billion in the bank (you can't earn any more than that). When the kid started asking if Alexander had various characters, my son nodded and said that he had them all. His friend didn't like that one bit. He started asking if Alexander had ghosts that I know do not exist. I could see the conflict on both of my kids' faces-they knew that Alexander had everyone you could buy, but they could see no reason not to believe the other boy. Despite what people and parenting magazines say, not all children lie. It's a pretty foreign concept to my kids (at least it is right now). I was proud at how polite they were to the boy. His mother made it worse by pointing out that he got help from his older brother. She was just trying to soften the blow to Alexander, but she ended up backing up her son's lies.

Having bolstered his own self-worth through falsehoods, the little boy turned his attention to "real" life. He had already announced that he is in the first grade. He leaned over my five year old Kindergartner and said, "I have two girlfriends. Do you have a girlfriend?" Alexander shrugged and said, "No, not a one." (Where did he learn to speak like that anyway?). The boy smirked, rubbed Alexander's head, and said, "That's good. It's a lot of trouble."

BACK ON TRACK-IKE DESTROYED SOMEONE ELSE

2008-09-17T00:41:00.002-05:00

I guess some poor kid started Kindergarten over in Texas because they bore the brunt of Ike instead of us. We were in Birmingham from a Sunday to a Thursday, when we finally had power again. Friday was a fun day of throwing out all of the food in our fridge and freezer. That was followed by a trip to the grocery store that, "Surprise!" had no food. We made a list of everything in our fridge as we tossed it because Katrina taught us that your homeowner's insurance will pay to replace the contents. Of course you have to way the money for food against the amount the company will raise your rates. You also have to take into account the fact that if enough people around you had damage and make claims, your rates will go up whether you benefit from the insurance or not...

We began school a week later than I'd planned. Alexander was convinced that he wouldn't like Kindergarten, but he was pleasantly surprised. He had claimed that he couldn't remember anything he'd learned in PreK, and I assured him that he would. On our first day, he turned to me and said, "You know Mom, you were right! I do remember some stuff." He spontaneously wrote a capital E to prove it. Of course, he didn't know that it was called E, but that's beside the point. Just like Kathleen, Alexander started K with tons more knowledge than he ended PreK with. I will go out on a limb and say that younger kids just aren't ready to process some of the stuff we throw at them. It does sink in, though, and they pull it out to dazzle you when they begin "real" school.

Kathleen is enjoying school too. For such a smart kid (I know that everyone always says that about their own child, but this girl is seriously intelligent and talented), she can't spell to save her life. She loves to write stories for fun, reads chapter books, etc., but the spelling is so bad it makes me want to weep. I can't say it enough-Phonics are the Devil's work. They make you think your child is making progress, but truly, they are learning how to read without learning much about the English language. Whole Language is the way to teach reading on the Good Side, and Alexander and Grace will never be introduced to the Dark Side of reading.

NOT THE SECOND DAY OF SCHOOL

2008-09-02T16:47:00.003-05:00

Well today should have been our second day of the new school year. Instead, we are whiling away the day in Birmingham, Alabama while the food in our powerless refrigerator rots. We are waiting on word that the power is back on and town closer to normal again before returning, since sitting in the house with no A/C and 90 degree weather isn't our family's idea of fun. We have Ike to look forward to worrying about in a week, so I guess we can't complain that life is dull. It may be officially time to look for a new state to live in. If the election keeps us in the grip of the Republican Machine, then perhaps we will be shopping for a new county...I've read that in some parts of Canada, homeschoolers get a free computer to use at home.

Speaking of the election, I am having more and more trouble not acting like a raving lunatic in front of my kids. The other evening, just before Obama's great speech at the convention, my nephew asked me if we were all Democrats. I said that we were. He then asked me what is the difference between Democrats and Republicans. Wow, that was a hard one. What kind of example would I be if I started spouting out stereotypes and ignorance? I also couldn't pull in some of my objections to Republican ideology because it deals with subject matter I didn't want to discuss with a ten year old boy (abortion and torture are two biggies there). With my unhelpful husband eagerly waiting for me to freak out, I explained that Republicans started a war and want to keep fighting it. I also talked about poor people, education, and other social issues that I thought he would understand. I hope I made some sense to him because I know that he is surrounded by Republican teachers, administrators, and peers on all sides. I grew up here too, so I know how hard it can be to be the only kid in class whose parents weren't voting Red.

THE KINDERGARTEN CURSE

2008-08-27T11:49:00.002-05:00

Maybe the Universe is trying to tell me something. Katrina devastated right after Kathleen started kindergarten, and I just made evacuation reservations to evade Gustav that would have us in a hotel on Alexander's first day of the big K...The weekend before Katrina, we went to Orange Beach, AL for a beachfront photo shoot at the request of their paternal grandmother. Guess what she wanted us to do this month? Go to Orange Beach again to take more shots because we have Grace now and didn't then. August/September 2005 isn't an experience I want to repeat, and I hope that this is just a false alarm.

I guess I'll pack up the new school books in the van if/when we evacuate. Not that I'd start something as important as Alexander's first day of real school in a hotel in Alabama, but if the worst happens, and we can't go home for a while, I'll be glad I brought the books.

SPEECHLESS

2008-08-15T17:19:00.001-05:00

Because we all know that accidents never happen, and all teachers are angels who would never harm our children...

BACK TO SCHOOL SHOPPING

2008-08-11T11:42:00.002-05:00

I am in the midst of buying books and supplies for the start of the Almaz Academy's school year. I am again resisting the pull of pre-packaged curriculums because I have yet to see one that I find appealing. One of the main reasons I homeschool is to allow my kids to learn through things that interest them, so buying a textbook set is no better for me than sending them to a traditional school. There are always subjects that require repetition and practice (in my educated opinion), so I've been searching for math, grammar, and spelling workbooks to fill that need. I found new math books yesterday at Sams Club that excited me. There were ones for each grade level up to fifth, so I bought the Kindergarten and third grade editions. The publisher is DK, who puts out thousands of educational titles.

The idea of teaching Alexander to read without the crutch of the phonics-based book I used with Kathleen is a bit scary. I still regret using that book, though, so I am strong in my conviction that the Whole Language Approach (with some simple phonics thrown in) is the way to go. I have been building up the idea of Kindergarten with Alexander because I want him to be excited to begin "real" school. I bought him an Indiana Jones t-shirt to mark the occasion, but if his first day is anything like Kathleen's, he'll still be in his pj's when he starts class :)

In the next week or two, I will have to head over to the local teacher's store to find grammar and spelling books for Kathleen. I love shopping on amazon.com, but with educational books, you really need to be able to flip through them. I did find several last year online that worked out great, but there are plenty of fancy looking duds out there.

THERE'S NOTHING "EXTRA" ABOUT IT

2008-07-29T10:01:00.002-05:00

It's that time of year again. Every mother in town is scrambling to sign her kids up for extra-curricular activities that begin in the fall. Why we need to worry about this in July, I don't know. Who decided that fall planning needed to begin in mid-summer? All of the stores have their "Back to School" sections in full swing, which is sadly necessary as school begins here on August 8th.

Kathleen is already registered for her dance class. She has also said that she wants to play soccer (goodbye Saturdays). She will still take the monthly cooking classes at the Young Chef's Academy. Alexander insists that he wants to take Karate. Since everyone else has activities, I figure that I'll enroll Grace in Creative Movement at the Parenting Center. It is relatively cheap and will give her some one-on-one time with me.

My belief is that none of these classes are necessarily "extra" to our curriculum. Besides learning the actual skills taught in each, my kids will learn some valuable lessons that I can't teach them. They learn to listen to a different authority figure than me, they learn how to work within a large group, and they get valuable time to socialize.

Adoption Entry 2

2008-07-23T12:32:00.002-05:00

We have our first meeting with the adoption agency tomorrow, and I'm nervous. The woman we are meeting with will get to decide if we are a "good fit" with their organization. If we are, we proceed to the homestudy. If not, we have to start all over again with the decisions. My husband doesn't see any reasons for concern, and he's probably right. That doesn't stop my worries though. I should just jump ahead and begin to stress about the homestudy itself :)

We are going to bring Grace with us to the meeting. It is probably better if we didn't, but we're kind of stuck. Kathleen and Alexander will be playing at their grandparent's house while we're gone. The meeting is all the way in the city, though, which means that I'll be gone for several hours. Grace would most likely be fine, but I'll be too far away to come back quickly if she's not. My real reason for bringing her is that she's sort of difficult to watch at the moment. She is into everything and thinks that, "No!" means, "Do it faster!" She has already broken things at my parent's house, and I'm not anxious for a repeat. Having the older two over there will be no extra work, but having Grace would be like someone turned a monkey or raccoon loose in their house. My plan is to bring along the portable DVD player with her favorite movies and some snacks. We'll bring the stroller and hopefully park her beside us with the movie to keep her happy. She might actually fall asleep in the car and stay sleeping when we go in, which would be excellent. If she's awake, it will be the perfect opportunity for the adoption woman to judge our patience as parents ;)

A CALENDAR OF MY VERY OWN

2008-07-20T23:26:00.002-05:00

My nephew only has seventeen days of summer left! The local public schools begin on August eighth, which seems like a crime to me. It will easily be in the mid-high nineties every day. I remember school starting at the end of August when I was kid, and I feel so sad for the kids today. Not only is their summer shorter, but their school days are longer.

I went over the calendar last week to determine when the Almaz Academy would open its doors for the 2008-2009 school year. On the eighth, when most kids in town will be dragged back into classrooms, my godmother will be in town visiting. Her annual trip is a big deal in our family, and the kids and I spend every day at my parents' or out in town with her. That kind of daily outing isn't conducive to the beginning of school work, so I decided to wait until she leaves to start. Then I realized that my brother will be in town for a visit for ten days starting on the twentieth. We will want to spend as much time with him as possible since we won't see him again until Christmas. Until very recently, he lived in town, so the kids are extremely close to him. That has lead me to choose September first as the official First Day of School. As long as I list that date on my letter of intent for the state and promise to hold school for one hundred and eighty days from that day, I'm in complete compliance with the law.

Speaking of setting dates, I have made the command decision to begin reading the first in the Harry Potter series to Kathleen in the very near future. I had wanted to wait and let her read them herself, but a recent viewing of one of the movies at her cousin's house changed my mind. He owns all of the ones out on DVD, and the only one she hasn't seen is the latest. The movies are all so different from the books, and I don't want her to have a polluted view of the series, which I'm afraid she'll get by watching the movies first. She's quite capable of reading Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone by herself, but the comprehension might be a bit over her head in some parts. After all, her gifted, almost-ten year old cousin didn't understand that Tom Riddle was a young Voldemort, even after having watched The Chamber of Secrets half a dozen times. I know that JK Rowling read the books to her young daughter as they were released, so I think I'd have her blessing to share her works of magic with my own children that way :)

TORTURE YOUR WAY TO READING SUCCESS

2008-07-15T00:29:00.004-05:00

I was just researching reading education books at Amazon and came across an interesting review. A book that most other parents and teachers were applauding for its effectiveness actually suggests using physical punishment for wrong answers! In the introduction, the book instructs parents to pinch their children when they read something incorrectly. Wow, imagine all of the great things I could force my kids to accomplish if I only tortured them!

It kind of reminds me of our neighbors. Their son is going into fourth grade next year. I know that he earns Good Grades because his mother told me, "We work hard for those A's." As a teacher, her use of the word we makes me cringe. Doesn't she understand that her son needs to accomplish things on his own? Even if she buys into the whole grade thing, she and her husband have gone beyond encouraging their child. They are trying to earn A's for him. I found out the other day that she has been driving him to a tutor every summer weekday at 8am! Poor kid; no wonder he always looks so serious. Since when does an A student need to spend his summer waking up early to go to a tutor? It sounds like this sweet little boy is actually normal, and maybe he wouldn't get straight A's on his own. In my professional opinion, tutors are for children who are struggling to comprehend subjects and progress through school. They aren't for needy parents who cannot accept less than an A+ kid.

While I'm abusing the neighbors, I'll point out that they keep a gun in their house (so we don't allow our kids to play over there), the wife makes the occasional racist comment ("I told my husband that if those little Mexicans can fix the siding, then so can he."), and the daughter was uninvited to another kid's birthday party because she's "Too mean." The mom also went on and on to me the other day about how the new neighborhood pool is a public pool, full of public germs. She won't let her children swim in it. Of course, they have their own pool...I guess it's easy to judge when you don't have to use the neighborhood pool.

TIME KEEPS FLYING

2008-07-10T20:57:00.002-05:00

It dawned on me the other day that in the fall, I will officially have two school-aged children. Not only that, but I'll have two full time students, instead of one and an occasional second. How in the world did I end up with kids this old?

Kathleen will be eight tomorrow, which I can't come to grips with. She's having a High School Musical themed birthday party. I was a little disheartened to see her veer away from her usual princesses and fairies (although I know she still likes them). Every year, her thing is to dress up to match her party's theme. The other day, she asked me what she could wear to go along with her choice. I mentioned that we could buy a HSM shirt, and she agreed. I had a brainstorm when we walked into the store and decided to check the toy costume section first. To Kathleen's delight, they had a red and white cheerleader costume that looks like the ones worn in the movie (even though not one of the main characters is a cheerleader). I told her that she could have the costume or a shirt (they had like seven to choose from). I totally left the decision up to her, but I was secretly pulling for the costume. I am notoriously anti-cheerleader, but wearing a costume to your party is much more little girl than wearing a t-shirt covered in teenagers. To my immense relief, she went with the cheerleader dress. She's going to wear it with her princess sneakers when we go to Red Lobster (her choice) for her birthday lunch. I'm not ready for her to stop dressing like characters and playing endlessly with her dollhouse and baby dolls, and I'm happy to say that she's not either.

A friend of a friend (or FOAF) has an eight year old who has a crush on my nephew. She told her mother that he wouldn't like her because she's not pretty. Her mom told her that she was, but the girl pointed out that she has protruding ears. Do you know what the FOAF said? That fixing her daughter's ears would be an easy surgery that she'd get for her when she's older!

I know that many parents are against dolls like Barbie (I personally hate the Bratz) and branding like the Disney Princesses, but I don't generally ban them. My Barbie-owning, Princess-loving eight year old has yet to complain about her looks or discuss plastic surgery.

WALL*E

2008-06-28T13:19:00.003-05:00

We took the kids to see WALL*E yesterday afternoon. Grace has been a huge fan of the commercials; she had no clue that there was a full length movie involved. During the previews, she was so excited that she kept giving her father hugs of joy. The other kids were also eagerly anticipating the film, although they weren't moved to physically celebrate like their little sister.

The movie had a great story, thought provoking message, and engaging hero. The kids liked the story, loved WALL*E, and were delighted with the visuals. The movie was so full of adult jokes (not gross out jokes like some kids movies, but intelligent jabs at big business and politics and our current techno-frenzy) that I want to watch it again on DVD to see some I missed. For example, by the time Earth was abandoned due to our bad habits, we had a Global CEO rather than a president or prime minister. There was one giant corporation that made everything, sold everything, and arranged everything.

As a parent with a much more natural bent than mainstream America, I was delighted to see the babies of the future being cared for by robots instead of people. The babies lived in little plastic isolettes with no apparent attachment to a parent figure of any kind. They were kept in groups, each run by a robot with a soothing voice. That seems to be the direction our society's parenting styles are heading in (if you read Parenting Magazine anyway). Pixar knows how to tweak our current obsessions and choices and bring them to obvious but obnoxious conclusions. The people communicating with others right beside them via floating computer screens, rather than by turning to face one another was another example of that.

The kids and I had some good talks about the ideas the movie put forth about pollution, mental laziness, too much reliance on technology, and what lack of exercise can do to you. It is the perfect "family movie".

THE STEAMBOAT FIASCO

2008-06-25T14:49:00.004-05:00

I have spent the past month looking forward to our homeschool group's field trip to ride a steam powered paddle wheeler down the Mississippi River, which is something the kids have never experienced. A mom (I'll call her Sara) who is new to our group set the whole thing up as her first attempt at arranging a field trip. I didn't tell Kathleen and Alexander about it until this past weekend (the trip was Monday) because I wasn't going to drive all of the way into New Orleans with the three of them and no other adult. Dad couldn't go because the group voted to do it on a Monday instead of the Friday I voted for. Grandma said she could go, though, so we were all set.

The trip was to cost $9.75 per person with an additional $6 each to cover lunch. The cruise usually serves a three course meal, but offers poboys, chips, and soda to their group packages. There was no word on what ages might be free, so I was prepared to pay for Grace, if necessary, even though she's only two.

Beginning on Sunday and even as late as Monday morning, emails began to fly around from people who were cancelling for various reasons. One mom had a sick kid, which no can predict. Another decided that she needed to stay home and clean her house. One punished her kids for something and took away the trip. I wonder what those second two moms are teaching their children about responsibility to others? Sara sent out a frantic note to say that the food was made ahead of the cruise (even though we were told we'd get a choice of sandwiches) and that she would have to pay for all food for no-shows. Some people wrote her back immediately to say that they would reimburse her for their food. It wasn't until an hour before we left the house that I found out that everyone under four would be free. That made my group smaller. It had already shrunken because I'd included my nephew when I signed up, but he was in day camp and couldn't attend. Since we were never told we would have to pay ahead or run into trouble with changes, I didn't think anything about changing things around.

At 2:05, my mom, Kathleen, Alexander, Grace, and myself arrived at the docks after an hour in the car, a $3 toll for the Causeway, and $10 for parking. I recognized another mom from our group, and she told me that no one else was there yet. That was kind of alarming, since the boat was already loading for the 2:30 cruise. Sara and several other families showed up right after we did, so it appeared that things would be okay.

Sara went up to the ticket counter to speak with a woman behind bullet-proof glass. Within seconds, we all knew that something was wrong because the woman was shaking her head and looking at Sara as if she were crazy. It turned out that she was insisting that we had to pay for all fifty-three people who had signed up, and that Sara would have to put the entire payment on her credit card, rather than have us pay individually. I think that if the latter was the only problem, then we would have been okay. All of us would have handed money or checks to Sara, and she would have charged the total. The fact that she was supposed to pay for the twenty people who were not there, and therefore could not be counted on to pay her back (especially for a trip they weren't on) put us in a serious situation. As the minutes ticked by, the unpleasant woman behind the glass brought over her supervisor, who turned out to be as unpleasant and unhelpful as her subordinate. She called the group coordinator whom Sara had set things up with. He had told her just that morning that everyone could pay for themselves and no one would have to pay for the no-shows. Even though the manager was speaking with this man on the phone, they could not agree to honor the agreement with Sara.

At one point, ten minutes before the ship was to sail, they announced that we could get on for $17.95 each, plus the $6 for lunch. My mom had already pointed out to me that for regular customers, anyone under six was free. That would make five year old Alexander exempt from having to buy a ticket, but for groups, he had to pay. With the sudden price change ("No, I don't think you know what a reservation is." -Seinfeld), I was going to have to pay $17.95 for a kid who would be free if I'd just walked up off the street! People debated the new price while the boat blew it's horn. Kids were beginning to notice that things weren't going according to plan. Mom and I priced things quickly and realized that it would be cheaper to just buy our own tickets and get on board. The problem was that we hadn't eaten anything since breakfast because we were planning to eat lunch on the boat. If we bought regular tickets, our only food option would be the three course meal at a cost of $27.95 for the two adults and $17.95 per kid. There was no way that we were going to load three kids onto a boat for two hours with nothing to feed them.

While we were debating, some moms decided to forget the cruise and visit the Aquarium instead. That meant that our group was even smaller all of a sudden. The manager announced that the price would now be $28.95 EACH plus the cost of food. That put us over the cost of the most expensive adult ticket for walk-ups who were getting a giant meal out of it, and they wanted to charge the kids that price too! They were making those of us left pay for the ones who weren't there. That was it for us, so Mom and I took the kids to lunch near the French Quarter and walked around Jackson Square for a little while before making the long drive home. The New Orleans Steamboat Company lost like $800 from people who were standing in 94 degree heat ready and willing to pay their agreed-upon price.

I think the lessons learned from this for anyone trying to plan a field trip are:

Find out if the company wants payment for the number you reserved for and not the actual number who show up. If they do, then have everyone pay ahead of time, with the knowledge that they cannot get a refund (like for a public school field trip).
Tell the families in the group the age cut-off for tickets so that they can accurately count how many paying members are in their party. When I emailed that I wanted to attend, I gave Sara the ages of my children, but she counted the two year old as a paying customer. The age range should have been one of her first questions when making the reservation.
Don't put people on your list of reservations until after you have conducted the date poll and gotten the results. I almost cancelled my whole family three weeks ago when I realized that it was going to be on a Monday and not the Friday I wanted. I don't know if she'd booked the trip for fifty-three at that point or not.

I am still smarting from the last field trip where I was charged full price for Grace (who was only one at the time) because she was walking and the other one year old in the group was riding in a backpack. No one charged that mom when her toddler started walking the tour later on. I am now wiser to the questions I will need to ask before signing up for any more trips. I can't complain too much, though, as I've never attempted to set up a trip before. I'm not that brave yet...

ALEXANDER'S FIRST CANOE TRIP

2008-06-22T12:40:00.003-05:00

Alexander beside the Bogue Falaya River.

Alexander was outfitted with his

Birthday Present Paddle, Darth Vadar Hat,

Cars Sunglasses, and Kid Lifevest

we've had for 8 years.

CAN YOU SPELL I-N-S-A-N-E ?

2008-06-20T14:25:00.002-05:00

Here is an article about an Ohio public school teacher who preached Christianity, kept a Bible displayed in his class (even after being told to remove it), and taught creationism in science class. Oh, and he also burned a cross into a student's arm. My favorite quote is:

"With the exception of the cross-burning episode ... I believe John Freshwater is teaching the values of the parents in the Mount Vernon school district,"

What values are those? Insubordination, ignoring the Constitution, torture, religious persecution, and ignorance? The fact that such a nut case could teach in public school for more than twenty years sends chills down my spine.

Even though I attended traditional schools and taught in some as an adult, I cannot fathom making the decision to send my children off to these places (at least at such a vulnerable age). Guess what? If your kid gets assigned to a known nut-case's classroom next school year, you can't do anything about it. Parent-requested student transfers are frowned upon in the public school universe.

SO FAR, SO GOOD

2008-06-16T14:41:00.002-05:00

The Almaz Academy is currently planning on recruiting a new student. We are officially sending in our adoption paperwork tomorrow to add another baby (and future student) to our family! The major hold up in finishing the application has been the current family photo. Not only did I have to scrutinize pictures from a self-centered "How do I look?" standpoint, but I tried to evaluate based on what some unknown woman might be looking for when she chooses a family for her baby. Since we aren't doing much school-wise this summer besides the science kits, most of my posts until September will revolve around our adoption journey.

Our adoption discussions brought about a conversation with Kathleen that makes me proud of our parenting skills, so I'm going to brag a bit. She was asking me when we were going to try and adopt a baby, and I asked her if she was worried at all that a new baby would take away more attention from her. She looked puzzled and said, "I've never thought about that." I then asked if she ever felt like she got less attention every time we'd added a new baby before. She told me with a smile that she'd never felt that way at all. I told her that Dad and I must be doing our jobs right then :) Of course, Grace will probably feel a bit differently, since she's never been a big sister before. I think we're going to have to work extra hard to keep her happy whenever her new brother or sister arrives.

I have no idea what is going to happen once we send in the papers...will it take a year to meet our son or daughter or will it be faster than we're expecting?

YOU HAVE TO LISTEN TO THIS SONG

2008-06-03T12:27:00.002-05:00

Tom Chapin's Not on the Test. It speaks for itself...

DO WE HAVE TO TALK LIKE THIS?

2008-05-30T00:12:00.004-05:00

I know that language is dynamic and changes over time. I know that once words become part of the common language and in books that they make their way into the dictionary. If that is truly what's happening with the newest slang words, then I can't imagine what my grandchildren will sound like...

The other morning, I caught a couple of minutes of the Today show, which I find to be more Entertainment Tonight than Nightly News. The travel guy was on, talking about affordable vacations people could take in our rough economic times. The interviewer interrupted him to bring up "staycations". I could see him wince before blowing her off and continuing with his piece. Apparently, the New York Times ran an article using that atrocious word. Later that morning, I saw a moment of The View, and that little genius Elizabeth used the word to describe spending Memorial Day in the park. So now we not only have do we have a ridiculous word, but we are already seeing it being misused (technically, a "staycation" is when you spend time exploring your hometown rather than go on vacation; going to the park on a work day doesn't fit that definition, but Mrs. Hasselback is wrong a lot).

Why do we need made up words like this? I guess my kids will sound behind the times when they talk to other kids, but I'm not using the hip vocabulary in my house. Thank goodness they aren't in school to pick these things up. Here are some more of the words that annoy me: "vacay" used instead of vacation (are we now so lazy that we can't use entire words?), "bump" for a pregnant woman's belly (I've been through that three times; my stomach wasn't so much a bump as a mountain).

I won't even go into the internet shorthand that has gotten out of control. I can see its use in instant messaging or texting because time is of the essence in those conversations. When you are writing an email or a post to a message board, do you really have to abbreviate everything? I've seen women use the abbreviation "DH", which stands for "Dear Husband" in sentences like, "DH ran out on me and the kids." What? Is he really a "Dear" then?

OMG, I won't be ROTFL when my DDs and DS start talking like this.

BORED?

2008-05-27T12:05:00.004-05:00

It's that time of year again. Schools are letting out for the summer and parents everywhere are faced with their annual dilemma: what to do with the kids? I'm not talking about parents who have to work and need to find someone to care for their children for ten weeks because that must be both difficult and expensive. This is about parents, usually stay-at-home-moms, who are freaked out about entertaining their bored children. I have a theory, backed up by Gatto's observations, that schools have a lot to do with this.

When in a traditional school do kids ever have a choice of how to spend their time? When I was a kid, I remember reading, writing short stories, or doodling in class when I was finished an assignment before the whole class was. Guess what? That type of freedom, even though it lasted on average ten minutes at a time, is gone. I found that out when I was teaching. I got reprimanded for not having assignments ready and waiting for children who finished the official ones ahead of time. I was supposed to have a folder of worksheets, and I was required to explain the procedure to my students. As soon as they were done with whatever I'd told them to do, they were to get up, walk to the folder, grab a worksheet, and sit down to work on it. Now, despite what educators will have you believe, kids aren't stupid. They knew that if only a couple of them were finished in time to complete these pages, they must not count for anything (like grades, which are all that matters in schools). Why would they be motivated to follow my instructions? Sure, I could have set up an elaborate system of point rewards that built up to some reward or a better grade, but that would have discriminated against those students who never finished early. How fair would that be?

Back to the boredom...how can children who are never allowed to decide for themselves how to spend their time possibly come up with fun things to do? A typical traditional-schooled child wakes up, gets dressed, eats breakfast, goes to school where he/she is told what to do for seven and a half hours, goes home, completes their homework, maybe watches some TV, attends some extracurricular activity, eats dinner, and goes to sleep. The rise of summer means the fall of 24/5 structure for these kids. They are programmed to follow a certain routine and then the routine falls apart. Enter the freaked out moms posting on message boards and asking what other freaked out moms do to fill the time with their own children.

I have to admit that I know of at least one family of homeschoolers whose kids go through the adjustment shock when summertime rolls around. They have some activity (or two) every single day of the week during the school year. Most families I know aren't quite so scheduled. The only time any of my kids has complained that they were bored was when we were trapped somewhere (like when we had to wait in a hotel lobby for an hour between a wedding ceremony and reception). They entertain themselves (or we entertain each other) in the car, at home, at the grocery, on vacation, at relatives homes, and on and on. They own tons of toys, they play video games (but not to excess), they watch cartoons, they play pretend games, they play dress up, Kathleen writes short stores and all manner of other things, they make things out of paper, they draw and make crafts, they watch nature and travel shows, they talk to their father and I, they play with their baby sister, they take care of their puppies, etc. I've never been asked to come up with an activity to keep them happy. That doesn't mean that we don't introduce new ways to learn and have fun or that we never leave the house. They took swimming lessons last summer, for example. Kathleen is going to take a week of sculpture classes in July. We aren't going to do much school work except for the science kits, so they will have more free time.

Am I afraid that they'll get bored? No way.

SUBWAY MISSED THE BOAT

2008-05-26T10:07:00.003-05:00

There's a firestorm going on in the homeschooling community today and it centers around a writing contest hosted by Subway. They excluded homeschoolers from entering, with no explanation. The grand prize includes $5,000 worth of athletic equipment to the winner's school, and I'm guessing that is the reason for the exclusion. Subway could have said that the equipment would go to the school of the winner's choice and avoided excluding millions of children. Of course, if a homeschooler won, they may want it for their homeshooling association or homeschool PE program or local YMCA. Oh, the horror!

The best part is that the contest description on the Subway website misspells the word united in "United States" and basket in "gift basket". Where did their writer go to school?

WHO COMES UP WITH THIS STUFF?

2008-05-22T08:44:00.003-05:00

The Almaz Academy is winding down for the summer (except for the science kits we will be using). I went over my list of the few things left to cover based on the Grade Level Expectations as set by the state of Louisiana's education department. One of the things left on it is the instruction to teach Kathleen about vibration and pitch. Her father is supposed to be covering those concepts since he's musical and wants an active role in her education. If he hasn't done it by Friday, I guess I'll have to teach it; or will I? Who in the world decided that second graders need to know what vibration and pitch are? I have nothing against teaching those ideas and terms to Kathleen (or Alexander, who is in PreK). I'm just truly curious as to why they are supposed to be taught in second grade. Also, why are they listed in science when they could just as easily (and more effectively) be taught in music class? Oh that's right, public schools have been cutting music out of the curriculum...

It just doesn't feel natural to teach things out of context and for no apparent reason. Another thing on the list is vertical and horizontal. There's nothing wrong with knowing those terms at Kathleen's age, but guess what? We've talked about it before. Shocking, I know. How dare I use words with my children before the state mandates I do? As a refresher, and so that I can truthfully claim that we talked about these words during second grade, we will be looking at photographs and talking about why some are better vertical vs horizontal. I might even go nuts and encourage Kathleen to take some photos herself and decide which aspect she wants to use!

If I followed the GLE's slavishly, then when a four year old Kathleen asked me where all of the people in the world came from, I guess I would have had to plead ignorance. When she asked a couple of days ago why Chinese people have different looking eyes than us, I should have said, "Wait until high school honey. If they haven't completely erased any mention of evolution in schools by then, you'll learn a bit about adaptations." Somewhere in the state capitol, a department of education employee died a little inside while I used phrases like "people began in Africa", "skin color is an adaptation to the environment and vitamin D level absorption", "there must be an advantage to eyes that shape where they adapted to live".

A DAY IN OUR LIFE

2008-05-19T14:51:00.002-05:00

7:40am
I wake up unusually early so that I can get myself and the kids ready for a 9:20 dentist appointment. Normally I wouldn't torture us with such an early time, but Kathleen has developed a large, purple swelling on her gums. It happened once last year above a loose tooth, and the dentist prescribed antibiotics. It happened again a couple of months ago, and the pediatrician told me that it was nothing. Since both kids were due for a cleaning, I went ahead and scheduled it for whatever time they had so that Kathleen's gums could get looked at. We don't have dental insurance, and I didn't want to pay $75 for a visit just to look at the swelling.

8:00am
I had to pull the covers off of Kathleen to wake her up. She stumbled off to the bathroom while Grace started stirring and calling me. I took her off to the potty (day #6 in nothing but underwear). Kathleen got dressed and I dressed Grace before I woke up Alexander. He was difficult to rouse; I ended up pulling him out of bed and standing him on the carpet to force him to wake up.

8:46am
I realized with a shock that it was already sixteen minutes past when I had planned to leave. Grace's five stops in the bathroom really slowed me down. She poops once a day, and I was afraid the urge would come on while I was driving.

9:20am
We walk into the dentist's office exactly on time. After signing in, Grace says she has to pee, so we all rush into the bathroom together. Remember the days when moms would/could just leave their kids sitting in places like waiting rooms without worrying that a crazy person would take them away or the office manager would accuse them of being a neglectful mother? Grace does pee, which her siblings and I applaud. Then Alexander announces that he too has to go (weren't we JUST at home?).

9:30am
The hygienist calls us to the back, and we all troop after her past the other patient areas. Kathleen is probably fine without me going into her treatment room, but I went for Alexander's sake. I wanted him to see his sister get her teeth cleaned to remind him that it wasn't a big deal. Kathleen put on her High School Musical sunglasses and laid down on the chair, cool as a cucumber. Alexander sat on the low bench assigned to siblings while I entertained Grace. Now is a good time to mention that just the thought of the dentist sends me into a mini panic. I have lots of awful childhood memories and some more recent ones from the hack pediatric dentist I took Kathleen to as a toddler. There had been a pit in my stomach at the thought of this visit since Sunday afternoon, and sitting there in the room was the first time that it began to ease.

The hygienist asked me to take the younger kids out while she took x-rays of Kathleen's teeth. Standing around in a hallway surrounded by people getting their teeth worked on wasn't good for my nerves, and Grace lost her small patience. By the time we went back to Kathleen's room, she was ready to go. I pulled out the trusty Nintendo DS to entertain her (thank God for the protective plastic screen shields I put on it). That worked briefly and then she asked to back to the bathroom. The little sucker knows that she can get out of anything by asking to pee. After the potty break (she didn't have to pee), she started asking for candy. Normally, my bag does not contain candy. I usually have some sort of toddler snack or crackers handy for hunger emergencies. On vacations, though, all sorts of bad stuff gets thrown in there. We went on a trip two weeks ago, and Grace hadn't forgotten that Mama had sweets hidden on her person. There I was with a dental hygienist working on my oldest daughter's teeth and my twenty-three month old was begging for candy right beside her. What's a mom to do? Calm her toddler down and prevent a meltdown that will bother every patient and employee in the place or preserve some dignity in the face of her other child's dental problems? Throw the fact that Grace didn't eat any breakfast besides breastmilk into the equation and you get a perfect storm of a dilemma.

10:00am
I began to slip Grace Smarties from inside my bag.

10:01am
The otherwise wonderful hygienist asks sweetly, "Whatcha eating?" to Grace.

10:01 and 1/2am
I admit that I did have candy in my purse, and she said to Grace, "Oh the sugar bugs love candy."

10:02-10:04
I imagine my husband sitting at his desk, listening to music, chatting with his coworkers (there's an extra person in the office today), having a snack if the mood struck him, and wonder how I can punish him for not standing beside me looking like a fool at the dentist's office.

10:35am
The dentist told me that Alexander's teeth were perfect and Kathleen's had three cavities. The swelling is being caused by the adult tooth coming down, and she needs to get the baby tooth out within the month or he wants to pull it. It's really loose, so that shouldn't be a problem. I made an appointment for later in the week for her to get a filling (for some annoying reason, he won't do them all at the same time). The third cavity is on a loose tooth, so he's nuts if he thinks I'm going to have it filled before it falls out (it's $125 a filling for goodness sake). I paid my $289 and herded the kids back to the van.

10:44am
We pull into the parking lot of Super Walmart because the weekend has totally decimated out pantry and fridge and because they have a McDonalds inside that will feed my hungry children before I drag them around the store. The kids and I have a ban on fast food and eating out (except for special occasions) between vacations. We decided it would be better for our health and trip fund, but today blew the ban. There was no chance that I was going to drive forty minutes back to the house from the dentist and then another sixty round trip to get to the grocery and back.

11:00am
While we ate (at two tables because each of the four four-person tables were taken up by one person), I watched Grace like she was a ticking time bomb. She hadn't pooped yet and it had been a while since she peed at the dentist's. I couldn't come up with a scenario that didn't involved throwing everyone's food back into the bags, picking up Grace's baby doll, my purse, the diaper bag, and Grace and running across the store like a mad woman to the bathroom. To my relief, she finished eating without saying she had to go.

11:15am
I decide that the smart thing to do would be to take everyone to the bathroom before we start grocery shopping. We still had to carry one bag with the food no one had finished, the bags, the doll, the baby, and three drinks. I put everything down on top of the baby changing station inside the bathroom and instructed the kids to stand guard while I took Grace into a stall. Inside the stall, I sprayed the seat with my tiny bottle of Lysol, wiped the residue off, pulled down Grace's small panties, put her on the seat, and waited for her to go so that I could cheer. She didn't go. I took her back off, pulled on her small panties, and marched her out to wash her hands with soap. Kathleen then took her turn in the stall and came out within two minutes. Alexander went in and didn't come out for twenty minutes...At one point, he asked me to wipe him, but not only was the door locked (and he has been able to wipe for a year now), but I was busy chasing Grace all over the bathroom. Periodically, she would announce her need to pee, and I would go through the whole routine while Kathleen watched our stuff. She never peed. Hundreds of people came through the bathroom and all thought that Kathleen and I were in line (okay, not hundreds). My sanity began to slip when Grace took a sip of her juice, leaned over, and spit it onto the floor. I felt like I was trapped in a nightmare or sketch show comedy. When I asked my son what the hold up was, he told me, "Mom, I can't go that fast." Keep in mind that he was wiping for like fifteen minutes...I think he had trouble reaching the paper coupled with a teenager's refusal to be rushed (he's five).

11:55am
We finally started shopping. I put Grace in the basket of the grocery cart because she's happier there. At one point, she started asking to walk. I told her no, and in her angry struggles to vent her frustrations, she hit her head on the basket. Inside, I said, "That's what happens when you act like that," but to her, I made soothing noises. Then she pulled out the ultimate little kid weapon, one which has never been used against me before. She cried out, "I dud do!" (which translates to "I love you!"). There was no way that I could ignore that, so I picked her up. The sling was at home (thanks to my husband who doesn't seem to understand that it lives in the car and thanks to my memory which forgets to remind me to bring it back out). After a few minutes, I put her down to walk on the condition that she holds her sister's hand. She did, for about five minutes. Since I mean what I say to the kids (no empty threats here), I scooped Grace up to put her back in the cart. Since I understand that no one, especially an almost two year old, enjoys shopping at Walmart, I made a chair out of paper towels and the diaper bag for her in the basket. She spent the rest of the trip riding like a little Queen and playing with the contents of the cart.

12:55pm
Alexander notices that the basket is empty because all of the food is on the conveyor belt at the register and asks if he can sit in it with his sister. I asked him where he thought I was going to put all of the bags, to which he replied, "In the basket with us." That kid has my lack of spacial ability matched up with his father's lack of attention to reality.

1:10pm
I load all of the groceries into the van and realize that Grace will fall asleep on the way home. It's been hours since she last peed, and there was no way I was going back into Walmart to use the potty. I rush to the grandparents' house across the street figuring she'll pee and we'll be on our way. She was already mostly asleep by the time we parked in their driveway. She woke up and peed (lots of clapping). Then she became despondent over leaving their dog behind after having only gotten to see him for a moment. Luckily, she fell back to sleep pretty quickly once we were on our way.

1:40pm
I unload all of the groceries from the van (with Alexander's help), coordinate the letting out of the puppies, and bring a sleeping Grace inside.

Since I apparently hadn't already filled my quota of Mom jobs already, the next couple of hours were packed full of puppies jumping on a sleeping/nursing baby's arm to wake her before she was ready, a puppy peeing on the tile minutes after being let in from the yard, Alexander's anger that a puppy chewed up his Lego insert from an Indiana Jones toy despite having been told a million times that anything left on the floor will get chewed up, Kathleen's Snow White dress being torn after being told that the puppies would love nothing better than to grab it and tear it, Grace taking sips of her brother's water from this morning, spitting it on the coffee table, and then spreading it around with her hands, and it's only 4:05pm...

READING LIKE A 100TH GRADER

2008-05-18T13:01:00.002-05:00

Today in the car, my nephew was announcing that his teacher told him that he reads at a twelfth grade level (he's in fourth grade at a traditional school). I have no doubts about his reading ability; he's read well since he first learned how and is in the Gifted program because of it. It struck me that I don't know how they determine reading levels and assign grade levels to them.

Since no two twelfth graders are exactly alike, what is a Twelfth Grade Reading Level? I've read that some kids are actually graduating high school barely literate, and I know that some go on to attend Harvard. How can there be one reading level for those two totally opposite groups and all of the ones in between? Even as a trained educator, the whole things sounds pretty made up. Can my nine year old nephew understand everything that an eighteen year old can? How are they on the same level if they can both read the same thing but only one of them understands the situation or context or vocabulary?

After he made the announcement to us, Kathleen pointed out that her mom read the last Harry Potter book in one day :) Does that mean I'm reading at a 100th grade level?